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kaosps2

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kaosps2
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  • Number of visits : 571
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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kaosps2's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend asked me if I wanted to go to the gym with him, and I responded that we could do another kind of workout upstairs. He quickly said he'd rather just go to the gym. FML

#20000076
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18867) - you deserved it (3870)

On 08/03/2012 at 8:14am - intimacy - by rejected4555 (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me he still has the key to our mailbox, while being at the other part of the country. Not to worry though, he sent it over. By mail. FML

#20000050
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21539) - you deserved it (1705)

On 08/03/2012 at 7:28am - misc - by Lara (woman) - Italy (Toscana)

Today, my soon-to-be stepson, 13, decided that he and I needed to spend "more quality time" together. His idea? We should start "bonding" by taking a bath together. When I said no, he told me I was being unfair, and that if I really loved him, I'd do it. FML

#19999925
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26118) - you deserved it (2018)

On 08/03/2012 at 4:21am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that I have been falsely accusing my sister of stealing my makeup. How do I know this? Because I found said makeup in the trunk of my boyfriend's car, next to a bag that had fishnet tights and red stilettos in it. Oh, and the stilettos are his size, in case you were wondering. FML

#19999762
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24242) - you deserved it (1844)

On 08/03/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by SingleAgain (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I discovered that the only reason my husband is taking yoga classes with me is because he wants to be flexible enough to suck his own rod. FML

#19996058
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27134) - you deserved it (4439)

On 08/01/2012 at 5:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52269) - you deserved it (9697)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52269) - you deserved it (9697)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I was upset over a recent break up. It showed while I was at work, and I made a customer sad just by looking blue. She complained to my manager. I got written up for being so depressed that I got a customer depressed too. FML

#19993921
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16198) - you deserved it (2064)

On 07/31/2012 at 2:42am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, due to my boyfriend teasing me about me possibly having been conceived on a beach because I was born in Hawaii, I finally asked my mom if I really was. She said no, but then told me in detail how much sex on a beach hurts when you get sand up your ass. FML

#19991998
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19014) - you deserved it (5039)

On 07/30/2012 at 1:56am - intimacy - by skyplaysguitar - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I finally met my daughter's boyfriend. He has a face tattoo. FML

#19988981
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26081) - you deserved it (4929)

On 07/28/2012 at 12:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, after rolling my car on the highway, I witnessed several people stop and get out of their cars to take pictures. No one asked if I was okay, and I was the one who had to call 911 for myself. FML

#19988721
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27117) - you deserved it (1915)

On 07/28/2012 at 5:56am - health - by Insomniac (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my husband and I were watching Lord of the Rings. My husband told me he sees the eye of Sauron every time he goes down on me. FML

#19986172
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21772) - you deserved it (3246)

On 07/26/2012 at 10:13pm - intimacy - by LOTRfail (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I mowed over a bird while mowing the lawn. It wasn't dead, so I had to mow over it a second time to put it out of its misery. Now there are pieces of dead bird all over my lawn and I can't sleep. FML

#19979145
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22531) - you deserved it (16327)

On 07/23/2012 at 3:35am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to sneak out of work early and pay a little visit to the pub. I ended up staggering home, drunkenly making myself a nacho cheese dorito milkshake with the blender, then promptly puked my guts out all over the kitchen table. FML

#19964691
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3374) - you deserved it (35088)

On 07/20/2012 at 5:38pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Wexford)



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