Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

kalen

Search for a member

kalen

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 28 August 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1263
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

kalen's page activity

Visits<b>prplr</b> - the 08/26/2009 at 6:16am<b>hallucinog3n</b> - the 04/02/2009 at 10:19am<b>jesslackszazz</b> - the 03/25/2009 at 12:22am

kalen's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

kalen's favorite FMLs

Today, Facebook told me I should reconnect with my husband. FML

#6967359
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28702) - you deserved it (7125)

On 12/27/2009 at 1:30am - love - by reconnect (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend told his best friend to text my sister telling her to tell me that he was breaking up with me. FML

#6177758
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28962) - you deserved it (2555)

On 11/06/2009 at 1:06am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was involved in a wreck. How quickly did the police arrive at the scene? Very quickly, considering he was the one who rear-ended me at a red light. FML

#5837946
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26782) - you deserved it (1651)

On 10/14/2009 at 11:18pm - misc - by gooddriver (woman) - United States

Today, I was talking and joking with my boyfriend. He said "Hey wanna hear a joke?" I said "Yes." He said, "Our relationship." and walked away. He seriously dumped me through a one-liner. FML

#5515193
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46928) - you deserved it (4594)

On 09/27/2009 at 9:16pm - love - by screwwyou (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my husband decided it was time to tell me he had a 3 year old son. We have been married for 5 years. FML

#5389483
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49582) - you deserved it (2688)

On 09/21/2009 at 5:35am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was in my psychology class taking the hardest test ever. After I spent most of the period trying to fill in the few answers that I knew, I looked up to see everyone with their notebooks on their desks. It was an open-note test. FML

#5335783
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11706) - you deserved it (53008)

On 09/18/2009 at 5:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was in class, playing online poker and keeping up my winning record. I eventually got seated against a guy who beat me at every hand. I heard laughing behind me after I lost all my winnings. The guy behind me had just made an account, looked over my shoulder, and won all my money. FML

#5333449
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14931) - you deserved it (47775)

On 09/18/2009 at 3:15pm - money - by shushingmoon (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I walked out of my college dorm to see that the intelligent person who locked their bike next to mine decided as an added security they would lock their bike to the rack, and to my bike. FML

#5329801
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36157) - you deserved it (1959)

On 09/18/2009 at 9:33am - misc - by cl512 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I took my car into the shop to get a minor problem fixed. I left several hours later, without my car. Why? The mechanic crashed it while out on a test drive to make sure he'd fixed the problem. FML

#5319386
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35088) - you deserved it (1698)

On 09/17/2009 at 8:02pm - misc - by mmv - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 7 year old daughter decided to use my laptop without my permission. She accidentally got SpaghettiOs on the screen, then used the hard side of a sponge, filled with soapy water, to scrub both the keyboard and screen of my laptop to clean it off so Mommy wouldn't know. FML

#5319261
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36654) - you deserved it (4677)

On 09/17/2009 at 7:58pm - kids - by Sadmom (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend getting it on with the neighbour's daughter. As soon as he saw me, he started singing 'It Wasn't Me' by Shaggy, completely naked, still sitting with the girl. FML

#4933603
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55135) - you deserved it (4419)

On 08/30/2009 at 5:26pm - love - by shaggy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was curious as to whether or not my mom was off of her medication. When I asked her, she pulled a knife on me. Looks like I got my answer. FML

#4905255
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46225) - you deserved it (4067)

On 08/29/2009 at 12:46pm - health - by mommy_issues (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was taking a shower outside at my fiancé's beach house. I was struggling to take my bikini bottoms off so I started to walk backwards to step out of it. Little did I know that I had pushed the door open. My fiancé, his family, and my family all saw me bend over naked. FML

#4895922
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32790) - you deserved it (7640)

On 08/29/2009 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got a knock on my door at 3AM. Turns out, if I ignore my mother long enough she will assume I have died and will call the cops. FML

#4889725
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36190) - you deserved it (11995)

On 08/28/2009 at 7:44pm - misc - by chasingcars0624 - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend of two years has children. Not one, not two, but three. Not with one, two, but three women. FML

#4876852
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47725) - you deserved it (4608)

On 08/28/2009 at 2:42am - misc - by helenablitz (woman) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Cynthia's illustrated FML
  • TFIF indeed. It's time to kick off the suit and tie and forget about work. Some of us are going out for drinks with friends, others are going to enjoy some live music and some brave fools are going to keep fit…

Friday 28 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: