Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

kakakarotcake

Online | Search for a member

kakakarotcake

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3076
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About kakakarotcake : I'm kakakarotcake. I am real super sand. I have defeated the likes of virginia, and freezey pop.

kakakarotcake's page activity

Visits<b>nikojhavlin</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 2:09pm<b>Jonaahhhh</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 10:13pm<b>bryanjamieluke</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 3:22pm<b>SplitEnds</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 2:49pm<b>thedudeguy1</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 11:33pm<b>Unthrifty</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 10:45pm<b>Rad630</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 7:08pm<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 3:43pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 12:19pm<b>yusi1891</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 11:50am<b>SJParker</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 11:19am<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 11:03am<b>1tsmenoah</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 9:05am<b>silon5</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 7:00am<b>BCguy3</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 3:40am<b>BigL99</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 11:25pm<b>asis88</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 4:20am<b>bettyxoxo</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 11:12pm

Liked!<b>Jonaahhhh</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 4:12am

kakakarotcake's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of kakakarotcake's badges

kakakarotcake's favorite FMLs

Today, I spent a quarter of an hour trying to figure out why my car wouldn't unlock, then why my number plate had changed. FML

#21322036
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3669) - you deserved it (4117)

On 12/22/2014 at 11:27am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I decorated my boyfriend's house for Christmas as a surprise, just in time for him and his family to come home. Also just in time for him to tell me he's Jewish. FML

#21322002
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15707) - you deserved it (4613)

On 12/22/2014 at 10:04am - love - by cwhitney7 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my fiancé pawned off my engagement ring so he could buy himself a PS4. FML

#21320958
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28536) - you deserved it (3448)

On 12/20/2014 at 3:00pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I felt a horrible pain while having sex with my wife, and I had to stop. I thought it was a hernia or something, but she called me a liar and accused me of everything from not finding her attractive, to me cheating on her. It turned out I had appendicitis. She still won't apologize. FML

#21319192
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36625) - you deserved it (2489)

On 12/17/2014 at 3:09pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my new friend tried to introduce me to "American Culture," as I am new to the city. He explained what a hamburger is and how it differs from the Asian food I was used to eating. I moved from Seattle and have worked at Burger King. FML

#21317624
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31362) - you deserved it (2438)

On 12/14/2014 at 10:30pm - misc - by AsianSensation (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, she started doing stupidly fake moaning, which then went really high-pitched like a little girl's, killing my hard-on. She says she thought that because I'm Japanese-American, I'd only be able to cum if she copied "those Japanese pornstars". FML

#21317298
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33066) - you deserved it (3615)

On 12/14/2014 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by dating a moron (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my vegan girlfriend openly admitted that she'd let me die if she had to choose between saving my life or an animal's. She actually seemed confused as to why that upset me. FML

#21316969
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30209) - you deserved it (3683)

On 12/13/2014 at 8:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend confessed that she's been cheating on me for the past two months. Apparently she thought I'd take it well, because when I yelled at her for being a heartless bitch, she stuttered "S-sike!" and tried to play it off as a prank. She's acting like we're still dating. FML

#21316716
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31503) - you deserved it (2456)

On 12/13/2014 at 11:19am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I came home to find out my roommate sold my PS4, because, "You don't use it anymore." FML

#21316533
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32044) - you deserved it (2320)

On 12/13/2014 at 12:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my oldest friend got engaged to her loving boyfriend of one year. Meanwhile, I can't even get my boyfriend of more than four years to commit to a decision of what he wants for dinner. FML

#21316127
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27241) - you deserved it (4054)

On 12/12/2014 at 10:17am - love - by galladore - United States (Illinois)

Today, I confronted my boyfriend after he received a text with a bunch of hearts on it. After arguing, turns out it was from me. FML

#21316114
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14212) - you deserved it (35467)

On 12/12/2014 at 9:39am - misc - by well, now what - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 2 years after eating in a 5-star restaurant. She said that she wasn't ready and that she would walk home by herself, which she did. A homeless gentleman walked up from behind me, patted me on the back and said, "Bitches man." I cried. FML

#21315476
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37283) - you deserved it (2650)

On 12/11/2014 at 7:01am - love - by Brasilian29 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up from a wet dream. My girlfriend quickly figured it out and bitched me out for having one when she was "right there" for me to ask for sex. Logic failure aside, the last time I flirted with her, she called me a sex-obsessed pig and didn't talk to me for three days. FML

#21315008
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32768) - you deserved it (3218)

On 12/10/2014 at 1:16pm - intimacy - by unlovedandunfucked (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found a very light blonde long hair on my marital bed's pillow. I confronted my husband about it and after hours of arguments and me throwing his stuff out of the house, I found another. Attached to my head. My husband isn't having an affair, I'm just going grey. FML

#21314908
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16551) - you deserved it (37485)

On 12/10/2014 at 7:59am - love - by mastel07 (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my daughter wasn't feeling well, so we allowed her to sleep in bed with us. She snuggled right up with my husband. I felt a little jealous until she turned around and cuddled with me, just long enough to throw up all over me. She then flipped back over and snuggled with her dad. FML

#21314569
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31741) - you deserved it (3258)

On 12/09/2014 at 5:39pm - kids - by SickMaMa - United States (New York)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: