kaitlynoliver11

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Offline (the 02/27/2015 at 8:02pm)

kaitlynoliver11

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1051
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About kaitlynoliver11 : I like food, swimming, singing, and never wearing shoes. Ever. Yep. That's about it.

kaitlynoliver11's page activity

Visits<b>ninthfirewings</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 8:19am<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 4:49am<b>Schala360</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 9:58am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 10:07pm<b>JosephAnders</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 4:51pm<b>jad0016</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 6:45am<b>MattBenid</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 4:25pm<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 6:22am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 9:04pm<b>BFons</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 11:07pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 12:22am<b>brasiliano</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 3:33pm<b>Blee864</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 11:28pm<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 2:16pm<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 5:50pm<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 1:58pm<b>btrag97</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 4:30pm<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 12:17pm

Fucked!<b>Schala360</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 3:58pm<b>S232Flash</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 3:04am<b>btrag97</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 10:31pm<b>seeoseek</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 2:23am<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 11:46pm

kaitlynoliver11's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of kaitlynoliver11's badges

kaitlynoliver11's favorite FMLs

Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML

by notsofriendly / 11/06/2014 at 3:15pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I took my girlfriend for what I thought would be a romantic horse-drawn carriage ride. We didn't expect the horse to die in the middle of it. FML

by subduedbeast / 10/27/2014 at 2:48pm / United States / Love

Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML

by Anonymous / 09/04/2014 at 2:44am / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

by cat lady / 08/30/2014 at 7:56am / Norway (Rogaland) / Animals

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

by KristaAaronn / 08/27/2014 at 8:24am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML

by oh shit / 07/06/2014 at 3:28pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my little sister was in charge of doing the vacuuming, when she decided our hamster had "dust on his back". FML

by gvmfvr / 05/08/2014 at 4:48pm / Animals

Today, it's been a week since I found an egg in the street that had seemingly fallen out of a nest. I'd bought a cage and an expensive incubator lamp to save it. It's thus been a week that I've been trying to save a mouldy old potato. FML

by mac cayne / 05/01/2014 at 11:13pm / France (Alsace) / Miscellaneous

Today, while meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time, her dad made a big show of cleaning his rifle, before loading it, taking aim, and blowing the hell out of a hornet's nest at the back of the yard. I fear for my life. FML

by Shit / 04/27/2014 at 1:25pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I used a facial mask for super sensitive skin, recommended by several friends with similar skin issues. Apparently, when the warning says, "May cause some slight redness for thirty minutes", it really means, "Your face will have hives and swell to twice its normal size for several hours." FML

by Tomatoe Face / 04/22/2014 at 1:31am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

Today, I was walking around school alone and felt someone tap my back. I laughed and turned around to find no one was there. I felt confused when I felt the tapping again, which is when I chose to yell at the nearest person, "What?!" I later found out it was a bottle in my backpack tapping me. FML

by ohmygod582 / 04/13/2014 at 9:32pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I resorted to the oldest prank in the book: laxatives in the food. Except it wasn't for a prank, but just a desperate attempt to get my clingy boyfriend to leave me the hell alone. I think I'm going to hell. FML

by someone / 04/01/2014 at 3:21pm / United States (West Virginia) / Love

Today, my Game of Thrones addicted girlfriend decided to name my penis Tyrion Lannister. FML

by off to the whorehouse, then / 03/31/2014 at 5:03pm / United Kingdom (Brighton and Hove) / Intimacy

Today, I was telling my friends about a date I had recently that went badly, because the guy turned out to be a moron. I said the last straw was when I used the word "decipher" and was met with a blank stare. I was then met with more blank stares. FML

by Anonymous / 03/19/2014 at 2:25am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I had to explain to my neighbours that I wasn't "watching porn" earlier, and that I was honestly just watching an episode of Game of Thrones. FML

by sh3lbst3r / 03/14/2014 at 6:59pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.