Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

kaitlynoliver11

Offline (yesterday at 4:29pm) | Search for a member

kaitlynoliver11

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 313
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About kaitlynoliver11 : I like food, swimming, singing, and never wearing shoes. Ever. Yep. That's about it.

kaitlynoliver11's page activity

Visits<b>btrag97</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 4:30pm<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 12:17pm<b>FelixJC</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 8:53pm<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 9:30am<b>JosephAnders</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 4:54pm<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 3:22pm<b>vertencar</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 6:23am<b>seeoseek</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 8:23pm<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 7:11pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 3:00pm<b>the_untouchables</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 7:39am<b>Cherryta</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 9:27pm<b>Ayezed</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 1:20pm<b>KawaiiPenguin13</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 9:46pm<b>Garagedwella</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 7:00am<b>Kar0</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:31pm<b>martini47</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 4:52pm<b>luohar</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 11:04pm

Liked!<b>btrag97</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 10:31pm<b>seeoseek</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 2:23am<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 11:46pm

kaitlynoliver11's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of kaitlynoliver11's badges

kaitlynoliver11's favorite FMLs

Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML

#21293465
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33119) - you deserved it (6414)

On 11/06/2014 at 3:15pm - love - by notsofriendly (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took my girlfriend for what I thought would be a romantic horse-drawn carriage ride. We didn't expect the horse to die in the middle of it. FML

#21286332
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48849) - you deserved it (3464)

On 10/27/2014 at 2:48pm - love - by subduedbeast - United States

Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML

#21251632
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42695) - you deserved it (3183)

On 09/04/2014 at 2:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40942) - you deserved it (9494)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML

#21200680
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52984) - you deserved it (7996)

On 07/06/2014 at 3:28pm - love - by oh shit (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my little sister was in charge of doing the vacuuming, when she decided our hamster had "dust on his back". FML

#21134608
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41017) - you deserved it (3528) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/08/2014 at 4:48pm - animals - by gvmfvr - Sent from mobile version

Today, while meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time, her dad made a big show of cleaning his rifle, before loading it, taking aim, and blowing the hell out of a hornet's nest at the back of the yard. I fear for my life. FML

#21124338
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43253) - you deserved it (6050)

On 04/27/2014 at 1:25pm - love - by Shit (man) - United States (California)

Today, I used a facial mask for super sensitive skin, recommended by several friends with similar skin issues. Apparently, when the warning says, "May cause some slight redness for thirty minutes", it really means, "Your face will have hives and swell to twice its normal size for several hours." FML

#21119632
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38280) - you deserved it (4530)

On 04/22/2014 at 1:31am - health - by Tomatoe Face - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was walking around school alone and felt someone tap my back. I laughed and turned around to find no one was there. I felt confused when I felt the tapping again, which is when I chose to yell at the nearest person, "What?!" I later found out it was a bottle in my backpack tapping me. FML

#21112284
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32694) - you deserved it (10431)

On 04/13/2014 at 9:32pm - misc - by ohmygod582 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I resorted to the oldest prank in the book: laxatives in the food. Except it wasn't for a prank, but just a desperate attempt to get my clingy boyfriend to leave me the hell alone. I think I'm going to hell. FML

#21101967
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38577) - you deserved it (10831)

On 04/01/2014 at 3:21pm - love - by someone (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my Game of Thrones addicted girlfriend decided to name my penis Tyrion Lannister. FML

#21101155
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41550) - you deserved it (6812)

On 03/31/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by off to the whorehouse, then (man) - United Kingdom (Brighton and Hove)

Today, I was telling my friends about a date I had recently that went badly, because the guy turned out to be a moron. I said the last straw was when I used the word "decipher" and was met with a blank stare. I was then met with more blank stares. FML

#21090611
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37809) - you deserved it (6355)

On 03/19/2014 at 2:25am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I had to explain to my neighbours that I wasn't "watching porn" earlier, and that I was honestly just watching an episode of Game of Thrones. FML



FML's blog

  • Cynthia's illustrated FML
  • TFIF indeed. It's time to kick off the suit and tie and forget about work. Some of us are going out for drinks with friends, others are going to enjoy some live music and some brave fools are going to keep fit…

Friday 28 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: