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kadajcloud's FML badges
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
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kadajcloud's favorite FMLs
Today, I was riding my bike home from the store. Wanting to impress some passers-by, I tried to do a trick on a sharp turn. I hit a pole with my balls. As I was lying on the ground in agony, a guy pulled over, took a picture, and took off laughing. FML
by Anonymous / 04/18/2013 at 5:02pm / Bulgaria (Sofiya) / Health
by Anonymous / 12/06/2012 at 11:49pm / United States (Minnesota) / Kids
by childhoodupinsmoke / 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was enjoying a nice bath, when one of my cats jumped up on the rim and started purring. I thought it was sweet, until my other cat ran in and body-slammed the first into the tub with me. Being a conscientious cat owner, I hadn't de-clawed them. FML
by Neutered / 11/27/2012 at 2:52pm / United States (Alaska) / Animals
by Anonymous / 11/20/2012 at 12:23pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
by weave9z / 09/03/2012 at 10:08pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous
by pride? what's that? :( / 08/31/2012 at 8:23pm / Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant) / Intimacy
Today, I was enjoying a romantic cuddle on the couch with my boyfriend, when he suddenly decided to lift up my shirt, stick his face into my boobs, and go all Darth Vader on me. This included heavy breathing and phrases such as, "Amber... I am your boyfriend." FML
by Amberain / 08/16/2012 at 11:16am / United Kingdom (Halton) / Love
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head on the living room couch. Apparently his two cats didn't approve, and they started attacking my face. Luckily for him, since my boyfriend was holding my head down, his privates didn't get a scratch. FML
by Anonymous / 08/15/2012 at 1:15pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy
Today, I decided to have some fun by joining a Harry Potter forum and making a thread saying it's all for little kids. When I checked back later, my post had been edited into me tearfully coming out of the closet, and some guy had said he'd passed my details on to Anonymous. FML
by icybrent94 / 08/05/2012 at 4:21pm / United Kingdom (Bedfordshire) / Geek
by trisha / 07/16/2012 at 4:57pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
Today, I got into a debate with my boyfriend over whether or not oral sex was considered sex. I stood firm that it was not. Apparently, he took this as permission, as later that night I walked in on him not having sex with my sister. FML
by oops / 07/15/2012 at 1:34am / United States / Intimacy
by shorty4 / 07/13/2012 at 10:36am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by hopeless / 07/06/2012 at 1:46am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML
- Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was… Today, I’m teaching French in a university in India. One of the students asked me if Paris was the… Today, I’m a babysitter for a 4 year-old little girl. All afternoon, I attended Barbie’s murder and…