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jynxpawzz

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jynxpawzz

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 437
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About jynxpawzz : I'm in Japan with my husband. He's in the US Navy. One more year and we can go home. :)

jynxpawzz's page activity

Visits<b>JoshuaOdom</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 12:54pm<b>yehyeh</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 2:45am<b>sweetkitten69</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 4:54am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 1:10am<b>dman1997</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 11:52pm<b>gofukurselv</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 1:02am<b>Dblocker</b> - the 12/13/2013 at 4:58pm<b>jemiller226</b> - the 12/13/2013 at 12:45pm<b>NeTgHoSt</b> - the 12/13/2013 at 6:10am<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 1:10am<b>kylefry6996</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 1:09am<b>cosicosei</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 9:17pm<b>yourmurderscenex</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 8:19pm<b>the1pumpCHUMP</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 7:27pm<b>swimgood</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 6:34pm<b>petey_gunz</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 6:09pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 6:09pm<b>Carrotop12</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 6:05pm

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jynxpawzz's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a wonderful dream where I got married to the perfect guy, then had the best sex of my life on a beautiful honeymoon. The only problem is that my "husband" was the snowman from Frozen, and that I got sad when I realized it was just a dream. FML

#21142020
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41986) - you deserved it (8936)

On 05/16/2014 at 5:07pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

#20929956
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45051) - you deserved it (4769)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:12am - animals - by IamAflyingCat - United States

Today, while leaving McDonald's, I threw a fry out the window to a flock of seagulls. I watched in the rear-view mirror as it landed in the opposite lane and about 60 winged rats descended upon the street, causing a truck to veer off the road and crash. FML

#20773275
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27152) - you deserved it (45478)

On 07/09/2013 at 10:48pm - misc - by John - United States

Today, I was texting my boyfriend when he said, "Hold up." Thinking it'd be funny, I ran and grabbed my copy of the movie Up, and took a picture of me holding it and sent it to him. He replied, "Getting real tired of your shit." Then dumped me for my "dumb taste in humor." FML

#20696601
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61639) - you deserved it (13454)

On 05/31/2013 at 12:16am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, it was raining heavily so I wore my black poncho as I walked to work. On the way there I noticed an old and seemingly homeless man following me. I turned around to confront him. He picked up a stick and screamed "Expecto Patronum!" Apparently I look like a dementor. FML

#20558527
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30855) - you deserved it (5839)

On 03/24/2013 at 8:23pm - misc - by Anna L. - United States (Texas)

Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML

#20490478
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22163) - you deserved it (34436)

On 02/02/2013 at 4:20pm - love - by Brock (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

#20483320
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45397) - you deserved it (5931) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version

Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML

#20482313
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36793) - you deserved it (2408)

On 01/27/2013 at 11:36pm - kids - by andy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

#20448629
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34191) - you deserved it (2763)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

#20155776
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26127) - you deserved it (2139)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm - misc - by Targeted - United States (Washington)

Today, my coworker and I were sitting and eating lunch. We noticed a little kid kept staring at us, and every time we looked away he would come a little bit closer. When he was right behind us, I looked and was startled enough to jump. The parents were three tables down laughing uncontrollably. FML

#20136682
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20250) - you deserved it (3182)

On 10/28/2012 at 8:29am - work - by radioinvader (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I babysat a 10-year-old and we played Pokémon. It was my first time playing, so he showed me. I ended up winning and the kid started crying and told his parents he hated me. They decided not to pay me for the night, and now I'm out of a job. FML

#20130128
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21877) - you deserved it (4275)

On 10/23/2012 at 6:00pm - kids - by Pokemon problems - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML

#18716901
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37220) - you deserved it (4928) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/05/2012 at 3:40pm - animals - by Fat_abott - France

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on going on and off. Why? The lights are activated by "clap on, clap off." It killed the mood. FML

#18150434
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32985) - you deserved it (8873)

On 11/03/2011 at 7:48pm - intimacy - by KayleeXLoVe21 - United States (New York)



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