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juuuliaaa

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juuuliaaa

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  • Number of visits : 456
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juuuliaaa's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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juuuliaaa's favorite FMLs

Today, I was going over to my friend's house for the first time. A creepy-looking old man answered, and smiled at me. I asked "Is this the right house? Does Isaac live here?" He replied "Yes, he's in the basement. Would you like a drink?" Right then, Isaac called and asked me where I was. FML

#18671217
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46743) - you deserved it (3237)

On 01/01/2012 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I took a poop that was three states of matter. Solid, liquid, and gas. FML

#18507550
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22712) - you deserved it (7200)

On 12/13/2011 at 10:45pm - health - by brownunderwear - United States (Washington)

Today, while working the drive-through at Mcdonald's, I was handing a gentleman his vanilla shake. He responded by popping the cap off, yelling "Fire in the hole!" And throwing it back in. He then quickly drove off. I was covered in vanilla shake. FML

#18279694
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35333) - you deserved it (4743)

On 11/18/2011 at 7:22am - work - by Anothernametaken (man) - United States

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35886) - you deserved it (18852)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy (woman) - United States

Today, a neo-Nazi stopped me and commented on my blue eyes and blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", and should follow him and other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, and other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around my neck. FML

#18067303
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43715) - you deserved it (3333)

On 10/24/2011 at 9:46pm - misc - by KaySchrages92 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was denied a waitressing job at a local diner I have been going to for years. Due to the fact that my name is Julia. They already have a waitress there named Julie. Apparently, I would "create too much confusion." FML

#17900400
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25720) - you deserved it (2115)

On 10/03/2011 at 11:22pm - work - by Julia (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I finally lost my virginity. In my boyfriend's racecar bed. FML

#17534409
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28662) - you deserved it (37674)

On 08/21/2011 at 12:54am - intimacy - by Emily - United States (New York)

Today, my mom took me to a counselor because of my addiction to watermelon. FML

#16990029
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31497) - you deserved it (5355)

On 07/05/2011 at 6:28pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I discovered a tick on my penis. After a long battle, he finally let go. Four hours later I'm in the hospital. My penis is twice the normal size. I may have won the battle but lost the war. FML

#16639445
449 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48184) - you deserved it (5570)

On 06/13/2011 at 2:25am - intimacy - by John jacob - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend and I pulled over to have sex in his mother's car. It was going great until I leaned back onto the horn, waking up our whole neighborhood. FML

#16635570
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9984) - you deserved it (40960)

On 06/12/2011 at 10:50pm - intimacy - by Shelly - United States (Indiana)

Today, my dad came round to the house. Looking rather pleased with himself he pulled out his phone, grinned, and chucked it over to me. I glanced at the screen to see a naked woman. He smiled and said "I tapped that last night". FML

#16480333
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43401) - you deserved it (4583)

On 06/03/2011 at 6:17am - intimacy - by peaaaak (woman) - United Kingdom (Thurrock)

Today, I'm too sunburned to masturbate. Now I have nothing to do. FML

#16432194
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20858) - you deserved it (64585)

On 05/31/2011 at 7:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I locked myself in the bathroom and started spanking the ferret. I started to get really into it when my dad started pounding on the door and yelled, "Son, that's great staying power, but can you finish up already?" FML

#16068047
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13353) - you deserved it (47358)

On 05/06/2011 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Saudi Arabia

Today, is the third day my ring won't come off. I used soap, vegetable oil, lotion, soaked my hand in ice to make the swelling of my finger to come down, and even my mom pulled so hard she dislocated my finger. FML

#16044218
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33733) - you deserved it (5275)

On 05/04/2011 at 1:31pm - misc - by Madi Jenna - United States

Today, I grabbed my t-shirt off the floor beside the bed and got up to walk my boyfriends dog. After several trips around the block and plenty of strange looks I got back upstairs and saw the used condom stuck to my sleeve from the night before. FML

#16000939
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14838) - you deserved it (41416)

On 05/01/2011 at 4:20am - intimacy - by Username - United States



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