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juuuliaaa

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juuuliaaa

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  • Number of visits : 414
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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juuuliaaa's FML badges

50 favourites

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Judgmental

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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juuuliaaa's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was texting a friend, I was going to warm up some cold pizza. As I got finished with a text I put the pizza in the microwave and set the timer. After the timer ran out, I opened the door and smelled burnt plastic. Turns out phones aren't meant to be in the microwave. FML

#3083696
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11730) - you deserved it (55688)

On 06/21/2009 at 3:34am - misc - by TBaggins00 (man) - United States (Illilois)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710
1165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82406) - you deserved it (219475)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at exactly midnight, I get a text from my boyfriend saying we were done. I had just seen him 4 hours ago when we were out celebrating my birthday, and asked why he didnt just tell me then. He replies 'I couldn't break up with you on your birthday but i wanted it to be over ASAP' FML

#2323618
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50463) - you deserved it (2981)

On 05/26/2009 at 9:09pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I spent the whole day seeing how many licks it would take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop: 763. I'm 24. FML

#2209832
393 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48679) - you deserved it (20987)

On 05/23/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by Tootsy_Roll_Pop (man) - United States

Today, my car died on a major road, a cop pulled over to help, he offered to jump me, while doing so because my battery was so dead he told me to put the gas on the floor, I did and my car roared to life, he then pulled me over five feet from where my car died to give me a ticket for a loud exhaust. FML

#2168919
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60164) - you deserved it (4758)

On 05/22/2009 at 12:17am - misc - by fmlcops (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had surgery on my foot. The doctor told me I'd be on crutches for 6 months. I texted my boyfriend the news, promising lots of intimate favors if he'd watch movies with me while on bed rest for the next week. He texted back, "No way. I don't date cripples." Dumped for a broken foot. FML

#1743823
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60226) - you deserved it (4690)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:28am - health - by gimp. (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I started my period. I am getting married tomorrow. So, not only am I going to be on my period for my wedding night and honeymoon, my best friend has to help me change my pad because my dress is so big. FML

#1292043
390 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73429) - you deserved it (8691)

On 04/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I got on an elevator with a woman and her child. I was the first one on. When she stepped on, the capacity alarm went off. As she left she told her daughter that's why fat people shouldn't be allowed in public. I'm 145 lbs. She was twice my size. I got called fat by a hippopotamus. FML

#721846
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (175992) - you deserved it (11866)

On 03/31/2009 at 10:17am - health - by warp_routine (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

#503348
875 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58670) - you deserved it (624023)

On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was nude modeling for the first time for a life art class. The only criteria for the class was that I not move at all while being observed. After a few seconds I noticed a really hot girl drawing me. I got a hard on. FML

#442796
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75397) - you deserved it (27821)

On 03/18/2009 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Opplyst11 - United States (Georgia)

Today, my friends and I were drinking boba. On the side of the cup it said "Please drink carefully to avoid choking on the Boba". I started to laugh at the ridiculousness of the label, and choked on the boba in a coughing fit. FML

#296354
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12961) - you deserved it (62787)

On 03/13/2009 at 12:24am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my cat got into the bathroom while I was changing my tampon. As I was throwing the applicator away, I felt a sharp pain around my vagina; I looked down to find him swatting at the tampon string. FML

Today, I woke up at my grandparents house since my mom was out of town, still half asleep i went to brush my teeth. Mid brush my mouth started getting numb I looked again at the tooth paste I used..turns out it was my grandpa's anti-itch anal cream. FML

#245062
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63530) - you deserved it (19560)

On 03/08/2009 at 7:57pm - misc - by poop - United States (Ohio)



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