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Today, my ex-girlfriend told my entire family and all my friends that we broke up because I came out to her. They all believe her. Twenty two texts and counting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26057) - you deserved it (2513)
On 06/06/2011 at 3:55am - misc - by rapturezz - United States
Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48125) - you deserved it (3251)
On 06/02/2011 at 5:45am - health - by meyo555 - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I was fired. My boss told me via email that it was because I "don't have enough experience with fun spiritual." Uh, what? FML
I agree, your life sucks (20967) - you deserved it (1775)
On 02/23/2011 at 5:36pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I found my mom eating cat biscuits. We don't have a cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27619) - you deserved it (2537)
On 02/17/2011 at 11:33am - animals - by Aled (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)
Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML
I agree, your life sucks (91413) - you deserved it (10768)
On 12/14/2010 at 3:21am - kids - by uglywoman - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I got married. When my father gave me away, in front of hundreds of people, to my groom, he said, "She's your problem now." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25504) - you deserved it (6404)
On 12/05/2010 at 1:25am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I got my lip pierced. By the orthodontist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29769) - you deserved it (2064)
On 10/19/2010 at 11:05pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, fifteen minutes after dinner was served, my blind date says "It's good that you're smart. Not to be rude, but most girls aren't. I mean, at some point, I'm going to pull my dick out of your mouth and then it's good if you have something interesting to say." Check please. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34460) - you deserved it (7050)
On 04/05/2010 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Hate2Date (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42748) - you deserved it (6374)
On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I sneezed with so much force while I was driving that I whacked my head on the steering wheel and honked the horn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17409) - you deserved it (2976)
On 01/10/2010 at 10:37pm - misc - by Hayley (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I work at a debt collections center and I had to call my own father. Merry Christmas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21069) - you deserved it (1891)
On 12/25/2009 at 12:16am - work - by kat (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I drove 600 miles to be with my boyfriend of two years for his uncle's funeral. He didn't want me to come because I am seven months pregnant and flying is dangerous in the third trimester. When I got there I don't know who was more suprised to see me: him, his wife, or their kids. FML
I agree, your life sucks (63015) - you deserved it (4396)
On 11/08/2009 at 10:39am - love - by homewrecker - United States
Today, I was called by my son's school. They said he'd been forging my signature and comments in his reading book. He didn't forge them. I don't know what's worse: my handwriting looking like a 6 year old's, or being too cowardly to admit it. He has a week of lunch detention, but I still have my dignity. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6477) - you deserved it (79354)
On 09/16/2009 at 1:05pm - kids - by Mac - Sent from mobile version
Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I have an extra key. I snuck into his bed with sleep with him and noticed how soft his skin was. Turns out I had been feeling up the girl he was sleeping with and he was in the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50343) - you deserved it (5371)
On 08/16/2009 at 7:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)
Today, I was putting on my new pair of jeans, when my girlfriend walked in. She found the "XS" size sticker on the side of my pants, held it for a little while then put it on my crotch. She then looked at me, gave a little shrug and half-smile and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38112) - you deserved it (5494)
On 08/04/2009 at 12:15am - love - by just_a_bit_akwRd (man) - United States (New York)
Monday 20 May 2013
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