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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I gave my wife her anniversary card. She started to giggle then walked in our bedroom and came back with the exact same card from last year. This is the second time I've done this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6019) - you deserved it (22074)
On 12/22/2009 at 8:03am - misc - by todayJman03 (man) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I finally got around to writing my Christmas cards. After finishing, I realized I had written "Happy Birthday" instead of "Merry Christmas" on every single one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7838) - you deserved it (25091)
On 12/20/2009 at 5:41pm - misc - by mannnnn2717 (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I found out I will not be getting my class ring. The jeweler has a policy against doing engravings that contain "obscene or offensive language or phrases". What obscene phrase did I want? My initials and year. W.T.F. 2010. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30906) - you deserved it (1915)
On 11/18/2009 at 2:41pm - misc - by Grad2010 (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was putting my contacts in when my daughter decided to jump on me from behind to scare me, causing me to poke myself in the eye. I'm now wearing an eye patch due to a scratched cornea while my daughter is singing some song titled "You are a pirate". FML
I agree, your life sucks (24096) - you deserved it (2043)
On 11/13/2009 at 5:06am - kids - by dessaye (man) - Singapore
Today, while walking to work, I accidentally dropped my $400 cell phone on the sidewalk. The screen shattered into a million pieces. A woman passing by looked at the ruined phone and said, "Now that's what you call a dropped call!" She laughed and kept walking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27769) - you deserved it (14795)
On 11/04/2009 at 5:37pm - misc - by Cellismasher (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my 6 year old son learned that if you give a mouse a cookie, he will ask for a glass of milk. But if you give a hamster a cookie, he will try to shove the whole thing in his mouth, choke, and die. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35200) - you deserved it (3407)
On 10/17/2009 at 5:08pm - kids - by hamster cookie - Sent from mobile version
Today, I realized that choosing to live in the honors dorms was a terrible mistake. Quiet hours start at 6 PM and the only exception is if you are a member of the university marching band, which means you can practice your instrument at anytime in the lounge... located next to my room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20130) - you deserved it (2951)
On 10/15/2009 at 7:17pm - misc - by Matt (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I am in a very long line at the supermarket, gazing about in complete boredom when I spot a lady cradling what appears to be a cute newborn baby. Being enamored of all babies, I get off the line, go over and say "Oh, what a cute little baby!" The lady was holding a coconut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6402) - you deserved it (36520)
On 10/10/2009 at 6:35pm - misc - by BEE (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I retook my ACT. I have been fighting a cold all week and have been very sneezy lately. Midway through the test, I got the urge to sneeze. Since it was very quiet and I didn't want to disturb the peace, I tried to hold my sneeze in. I ended up letting out a huge fart instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29131) - you deserved it (7266)
On 10/05/2009 at 10:21pm - misc - by Sneezy123 (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I got an email from the company that manages my Cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40779) - you deserved it (2978)
On 10/05/2009 at 3:23pm - animals - by APetsPet (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I told my daughter how her eyes look exactly as pretty as my wife's. She told me that she loved the way my eyeballs stick out of my face, just like Elmo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30512) - you deserved it (3673)
On 10/03/2009 at 8:33am - kids - by dessaye (man) - Singapore
Today, I went online to check my credit report. My credit report says that I am deceased, and have no rating. I'm at least 90% sure that this is not true. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30567) - you deserved it (1496)
On 09/22/2009 at 8:27pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I fell asleep during naptime. I'm the teacher. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13789) - you deserved it (25802)
On 09/03/2009 at 1:05am - work - by yogabbagabba (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I spotted my neighbour's cat sitting on their front garden. I bent over and began walking towards it with my hand out saying, "Hello pussycat". I was only a few feet away when I realised I was talking to a white bag of sand. I turned to see my family in hysterics. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9336) - you deserved it (26989)
On 08/25/2009 at 7:40am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)
Today, I had my friend Mark over for dinner. My Dad asked him what his dad did for a living. We all squirmed a bit when he told us that his dad died last year. We all went about finishing our meal when suddenly my dad says: "I'm sorry, Mark, what did you say your dad did for a living again?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (43642) - you deserved it (1984)
On 08/25/2009 at 12:40am - misc - by youzabadgirl12 - United States (South Carolina)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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