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junegirl63's FML badges
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junegirl63's favorite FMLs
Today, I came home crying after my boyfriend dumped me for another girl. My dad told me to come tell him what was wrong. I sat down and let it all out, after which he looked up from his book, into my eyes, and gave me his loving advice: "Just cry about it and move on to another bastard." FML
by bastard magnet / 10/02/2011 at 6:14pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, the girl I've been dating, and starting to fall in love with, walked out of the bathroom claiming we were going to be parents. I jumped off of the couch in disbelief, yelling, "Really?" She replied, "Really. I just gave birth to a huge dump baby." FML
by CaseyFpC85 / 09/11/2011 at 11:13am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/31/2011 at 10:23am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Intimacy
Today, I was on a train when we hit and killed a person. We were stalled for 4 hours. The guy sitting next to me asked what I did for a living, so I told him that I'm a vet tech. Then he showed me his infected elbow. FML
by Anonymous / 08/30/2011 at 10:51am / United States / Transportation
by skichick54 / 08/24/2011 at 1:28am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by Emily / 08/21/2011 at 12:54am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, thinking I was alone in a public bathroom, I started singing the words to my favorite song. A minute later that I heard a toilet flush, so I just sat there petrified. The other person sarcastically picked up the singing from where I left off. FML
by bathroomgirl / 08/11/2011 at 12:09pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my house was raided for drugs. I had to find out my father is a drug dealer. The cops then told me this wasn't their first time here, but it was the first time I was home to see it. They said it was nice to finally meet me. FML
by thehumanshield / 08/05/2011 at 4:41am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, a bunch of guys at work chased me down a corridor with a Febreze spray for smelling like I'd been "sleeping in a hollowed-out horse's carcass" and having "the personal hygiene of a billy goat." FML
by Champion the wonder horse / 07/28/2011 at 4:15am / United States / Work
by 44haley44 / 07/12/2011 at 1:25pm / United States / Intimacy
by Yoda / 07/08/2011 at 1:23am / United States (New York) / Geek
by anonbob / 07/07/2011 at 9:28pm / New Zealand (Wellington) / Love
by IAmACoolCat / 07/05/2011 at 12:41pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
by crudofalife / 07/04/2011 at 5:42am / United States (Illinois) / Work
by parenting sucks / 07/01/2011 at 1:42pm / United States (New York) / Kids
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…