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Today, while in the bathroom, I started absent-mindedly drumming on my thighs. I didn't stop to think that people outside would think I was masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15316) - you deserved it (4972)
On 05/21/2012 at 1:56am - intimacy - by morethanredhands -
Today, I went to the store for some pads with my dad. We got them and then went to the cashier. That's when he realized that they were scented. He took one out of the box, sniffed it, made me sniff it, then insisted the cashier smell it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19823) - you deserved it (1508)
On 05/13/2012 at 1:02am - misc - by vron991 - United States (Delaware)
Today, I was having a hard time waking up. When I sat down for breakfast, my chair rocked backwards. I reflexively grabbed out at something to hold on to. Unfortunately, I grabbed the cereal box that was on the table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14782) - you deserved it (2110) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/18/2012 at 12:38am - misc - by Fillifilo (woman) - France
Today, during sex, my boyfriend stops and asks if he can eat a sandwich while we do it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20072) - you deserved it (3025)
On 04/05/2012 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Krissy (woman) - United States
Today, I found out my 12 year old daughter is going through a bit of an "emotional" stage. I got a call from her school saying she was sitting in the corner at recess trying to cut her wrist. With a plastic spoon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22227) - you deserved it (4404)
On 03/26/2012 at 10:54am - kids - by ohhdear.___. (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my dad insisted on having a family movie night. He chose the movies Jaws and Mayday. I'm going on a diving expedition tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16295) - you deserved it (2075)
On 03/13/2012 at 1:59pm - misc - by Samantha - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was posing in front of the mirror, when I realized that everyone who looks at me can easily tell which arm I use to masturbate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6919) - you deserved it (21274)
On 02/24/2012 at 2:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I came back from a holiday and the friend who'd been looking after my cats returned my spare key. When I wanted to put some relaxing music on, I noticed that he'd switched most of my CDs around in their cases. I have over a thousand of them. Very funny, thanks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16018) - you deserved it (2960)
On 02/23/2012 at 6:52pm - misc - by Veryfunny (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I didn't have plans on shaving my pubic hair. My girlfriend's braces thought otherwise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13908) - you deserved it (24728)
On 01/24/2012 at 3:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)
Today, I totaled my car, because I mistook the leaves blowing across the road for a child. I swerved and hit a tree. The home owner wants to sue for "harming his tree" and hospital wants to test my mental stability. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17445) - you deserved it (4008)
On 01/22/2012 at 8:52pm - misc - by wrecked - United States
Today, I went on a date to the zoo. I soon found out that my date had eaten several hash brownies before entering. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17974) - you deserved it (2813)
On 01/16/2012 at 3:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my parents want me to become a lawyer, all because our family members keep getting into feuds and court cases. I'm a successful developer, and run my own company. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16941) - you deserved it (1752)
On 01/12/2012 at 5:14am - work - by me_the_maniak - India (Maharashtra)
Today, I put a blue toilet cleaner square in the back of toilet. My fiancé called me later on freaking out because he couldn't get the "blue water to go away" when he flushed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17590) - you deserved it (2203)
On 12/06/2011 at 8:38pm - love - by sparklethelette - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my girlfriend refered to her vagina as a meat wallet, and to my penis as small change. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26542) - you deserved it (4027)
On 12/03/2011 at 5:04am - intimacy - by trembelwick - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I discovered that you should always unplug the electric mixer before licking the beaters. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8100) - you deserved it (52479)
On 11/29/2011 at 12:21pm - misc - by seanjohn268 (man) - Canada
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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