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julian928's favorite FMLs
by d0rk_ / 09/02/2011 at 4:44pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous
Today, my report card finally came in. My mom took one look at it and told me that if I'm not going to take my grades seriously, I might as well start looking for a sugar daddy. But first, I apparently need to work on prettying myself up. FML
by tryingtobepretty101 / 09/02/2011 at 12:58pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at a music festival, watching one of my favorite bands. The security guys were throwing water into the crowd to cool us down. I saw some about to be thrown by another fan, so I stood with my mouth open to catch some of it. I ended up with a face full of hot piss. FML
by Anonymous / 09/02/2011 at 9:45am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband went in for surgery and handed me an important document. It wasn't a will or anything similar, but a list of items and gold he wanted passed on to guild members on World of Warcraft. FML
by WoWWidow / 09/02/2011 at 4:02am / United States (California) / Health
by mannydanny / 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm / United Kingdom (Coventry) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/01/2011 at 2:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids
Today, I was DJing on a popular local radio station when a pop-up window appeared on the station's computer. Of all the possible sounds that could have played, it was a girl screaming in pleasure. It went out live on air. FML
by djfail / 09/01/2011 at 1:56pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy
by DogDoingScience / 09/01/2011 at 11:45am / Czech Republic (Jihomoravsky kraj) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/01/2011 at 3:07am / United Kingdom / Love
by bob / 09/01/2011 at 1:29am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Username / 08/14/2011 at 1:44pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a scary movie. I was starting to get a small headache so he gently brushed my hair. During a scary part he jumped and hit me in the head as hard as he could with the brush. I'm still recovering from the migraine. FML
by Username / 08/13/2011 at 7:45am / United States (New Jersey) / Love
Today, I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about him liking my best friend. I guess it made him mad because he yelled "Breast cancer!" at the top of his lungs before power-punching my right boob. FML
by brittbrat4 / 08/13/2011 at 2:51am / United States (Florida) / Kids
by bTOhno / 08/13/2011 at 2:37am / United States (Oklahoma) / Love
by sydneybourgeois / 08/13/2011 at 12:06am / United States (Texas) / Love