About julako : "I am a linguist. I love ambiguity more than most people."
julako's FML badges
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
julako's favorite FMLs
Today, I got pulled over for having an expired registration. I also found out my husband hasn't been paying for my car insurance. Luckily, I didn't get arrested because I had my baby with me. They towed my car and gave me 2 tickets and a court date. Oh, and the cop sent me a friend request. FML
Today, I brought my best friend to the strip club as a birthday gift, as he had mentioned that he'd never been to one before. It might have been ruined by the discovery that his daughter had a new job. FML
by Natsert99 / 12/08/2016 at 9:02am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I finally determined the source of the horrible smell that periodically invades my apartment: there's nothing wrong with the plumbing as I previously thought, I can just smell my neighbors pooping in their bathroom on the other side of the wall. FML
by Dear God Why / 12/05/2016 at 8:07am / Miscellaneous
Today, I got to meet the guy that I have been talking to over a dating website. We were having a great time, at least until I managed to randomly fall asleep in front of him. I spent the rest of the day sending text messages trying to explain to him that I suffer from narcolepsy. FML
by PinkMonkeys / 11/23/2016 at 1:33pm / Love
by calgarygal / 11/22/2016 at 9:53pm / Miscellaneous
Today, I tried to make things less awkward by complimenting my Tai Chi partner's ring and he says, "Thanks, it's a purity ring!" I said, "I used to have one of those. Would you believe me if I said I lost it in a river?" Now my entire Tai Chi class thinks I lost my virginity in a river. FML
Today, my husband and I finally had the house to ourselves, so we had unusually loud sex. Banging bed, yelling obscenities, super rowdy, etc. I then see my mother-in-law out the window. She had let herself in, dropped off a bag and apparently ran out. Thanksgiving is going to be weird. FML
by daughter in law / 11/08/2016 at 1:05am / United States / Intimacy
by I'm an asshole / 11/03/2016 at 5:46pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/23/2016 at 6:12am / Pakistan (Punjab) / Work
by cereal stepper / 10/23/2016 at 5:42am / Miscellaneous