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josiem

Offline (the 09/19/2014 at 9:20pm) | Search for a member

josiem

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 822
  • Number of comments : 67
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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josiem's page activity

Visits<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 7:10pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 9:21pm<b>SingingFarmGirl</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 3:34pm<b>xDochx</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 11:33pm<b>MrsKent123</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 11:58am<b>testtest2</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 10:52am<b>grogers311</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 8:30am<b>hippodamia</b> - the 05/03/2013 at 11:16pm<b>waterboy14</b> - the 05/03/2013 at 6:41am<b>ireynkc</b> - the 05/03/2013 at 4:29am<b>KVKdragon</b> - the 05/03/2013 at 4:25am<b>PhotoSmith</b> - the 05/03/2013 at 3:47am<b>MGITSWFTC</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 11:16pm<b>jeffandjeff</b> - the 04/23/2013 at 3:02pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 7:27pm<b>Ergayles</b> - the 04/08/2013 at 12:24am<b>decimater</b> - the 03/20/2013 at 11:42pm

josiem's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of josiem's badges

josiem's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

#17089969
509 comments

I agree, your life sucks (131502) - you deserved it (7340)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by whyme102008 - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to drive my drunk parents home from a party. They leaned out the window and barked at everyone we passed all the way home. FML

#16968738
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30252) - you deserved it (3507)

On 07/04/2011 at 1:45am - misc - by monquiqui (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I had a parent-teacher conference with my 8 year old son. He'd written "Chuck Norris" as the answer for every question on his test. FML

#16217085
441 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37783) - you deserved it (10277)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:54am - kids - by yobruh -

Today, I found some nude vintage pictures in my house. I decided to beat my meat to them. Later I found out it was my grandma. FML

#14583340
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15680) - you deserved it (75421)

On 01/14/2011 at 11:05pm - intimacy - by Gabriel A - United States (Ohio)

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML

#14199055
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (112809) - you deserved it (15248)

On 12/14/2010 at 3:21am - kids - by uglywoman - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was in the car hooking up with my boyfriend. He was on top of me when I noticed my neighbor jogging toward the car. Instead of hiding, I felt compelled to wave as he jogged past us. FML

#13799925
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6714) - you deserved it (37427)

On 11/11/2010 at 8:34am - intimacy - by Caught (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, at the Museum I volunteer at, I was touching some of the things in the exhibit where you can feel what natural boobs and testes feel like. I started rolling the "boob" like a stress ball and forgot where I was. When I realized people were staring, it became very awkward. FML

#13799355
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9158) - you deserved it (38487)

On 11/11/2010 at 6:30am - intimacy - by latino (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went on a first date to the movies. During the flick, I choked on a piece of popcorn. I took a gulp of soda and that got stuck as well. I finally got my breath back and let out the loudest burp I ever have. He looked at me and said "Does this mean I can fart now?" FML

#13220186
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16093) - you deserved it (25967)

On 09/27/2010 at 7:45am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was on an airplane, riding in first class for the first time in my life. The man next to me turned to me just before takeoff, stared at my chest, and said that he hoped there would be severe turbulence. FML

#13198134
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33765) - you deserved it (3898)

On 09/25/2010 at 5:49pm - misc - by huj - United States (Texas)

Today, my chemistry professor made us all leave our classroom mid-lab because the class was complaining of the smell, and he was worried that there was a gas leak from one of the Bunsen burners. There wasn't, but it's nice to know my "silent but deadly" smelled like it might actually kill. FML

#13169331
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10013) - you deserved it (33005)

On 09/23/2010 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my father made his bellybutton talk. In front of my new boyfriend. FML

#12049676
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30554) - you deserved it (3953)

On 07/22/2010 at 7:14pm - love - by coffee_princess (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I've recently gained weight so I bought an exercise video. I started it right away in my room on the top floor. My younger sister screamed and ran outside a few minutes later. She thought it was an earthquake. FML

#11865183
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34300) - you deserved it (9373)

On 07/14/2010 at 12:32am - health - by sarah - United States

Today, my boyfriend hacked my facebook account and set my status to say that I was in love with my boss. Seeing the post, my boss called me into his office, and told me he loved me too... FML

#11858705
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49878) - you deserved it (4165)

On 07/13/2010 at 8:02pm - work - by Camille (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, the water in my shower wouldn't drain so I used a snake to unclog it. I pulled almost a full foot of nasty hair and gunk out of the drain. I just moved in, and the previous owner was an elderly woman. I just pulled a foot of old lady pubes out of my drain. FML

#9129175
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32966) - you deserved it (2913)

On 03/16/2010 at 10:40am - misc - by please_no (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

#9110965
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40337) - you deserved it (8394)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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