Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

josephramayrat

Search for a member

josephramayrat

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 17 September 1998 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 287
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

josephramayrat's page activity

Visits<b>SevanaRatchet</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 7:43pm<b>ironfey</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 12:44am<b>kissingcars</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 12:51am<b>HowieDoIt</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 1:10am<b>getcrazy</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 12:31pm<b>Opie_Winston</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 12:44pm<b>tazmanmike2013</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 12:32am<b>bballer4life895</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 8:58am<b>JessicaRenee95</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 8:55am<b>helpfulwhale</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 1:27pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 10:43am<b>bwahr15</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 10:49am<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 11:22pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 11:03pm<b>Rainhawk94</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 7:33am<b>Whiplash169</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 7:16am<b>Kar0</b> - the 11/11/2013 at 4:19pm<b>Sriehl</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 10:44am

josephramayrat's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of josephramayrat's badges

josephramayrat's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up in my hospital bed after having knee surgery, on the wrong knee. FML

#20986378
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66231) - you deserved it (3588)

On 12/09/2013 at 2:17pm - health - by knee pain - United States

Today, I had a seizure in class. Being an epileptic, I had warned my professor of the possibility that I could have one in class. She was understanding and seemed very concerned about my issue at the time. After I had the seizure, however, she asked me if I had ever tried exorcism. FML

#20963219
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43910) - you deserved it (2491)

On 11/19/2013 at 10:00am - health - by seizuregirl17 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while I was working out, I was listening to music with my earbuds in. The Pokémon theme started playing and I begun singing along. It wasn't too long after that I remembered I was in a crowded gym on a military base. FML

#20940589
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37151) - you deserved it (10568)

On 10/31/2013 at 7:18pm - misc - by GymBattle (man) - United States

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school today. She had been telling the teacher, "I have a huge boner." Apparently, some of the kids at school told her it meant 'headache' and she's been saying it all day. FML

#20928358
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41187) - you deserved it (3152)

On 10/20/2013 at 11:51pm - kids - by momaaa1342 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was working behind the bar at a club. After serving drinks to a guy, he asked me if I could carry them outside to the two girls waiting for him. I scowled at him and told him I wasn't a waitress. That's when I realised he had one arm. FML

#20910594
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21789) - you deserved it (51164)

On 10/07/2013 at 3:37am - work - by bitch (woman) - Australia

Today, my dog figured out she can wipe her butthole on my walls after having squeezed out a turd or two. FML

#20905661
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38019) - you deserved it (3266)

On 10/03/2013 at 4:26am - animals - by hoo flung pu - United States

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

#20898181
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66608) - you deserved it (4054)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I called work crying, telling them that I wouldn't be able to go to work tomorrow due to my grandmother's sudden and tragic death. After hanging up, I walked into the midnight release of Grand Theft Auto 5. I had no idea my boss was also an avid gamer. FML

#20884742
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17975) - you deserved it (88605)

On 09/17/2013 at 12:36am - work - by fired (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

#20876988
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49400) - you deserved it (3941)

On 09/11/2013 at 12:57pm - animals - by ugh Buck! (woman) - United States

Today, I was asked to leave a church service for laughing at the kids trying to sing. FML

#20876850
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22179) - you deserved it (74473)

On 09/11/2013 at 9:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

#20820496
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67016) - you deserved it (8838)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I finally felt ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. It all went great, until I tried putting the condom on him. In the process, I managed to nick his penis not once, but three times with my nails. His eyes brimmed with tears and he completely lost his erection. FML

#20817205
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46286) - you deserved it (25240)

On 08/02/2013 at 3:44pm - intimacy - by fuck but no fuck (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, after giving me my very first orgasm, my boyfriend sat me down and had a serious chat with me about my orgasm face. Apparently it reminded him of the scene in the Exorcist with the possessed girl, and it really freaked him out. FML

#20816805
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58777) - you deserved it (7472)

On 08/02/2013 at 10:08am - intimacy - by right (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML

#20816318
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51556) - you deserved it (11147)

On 08/02/2013 at 12:39am - intimacy - by whyeventry? (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my father shot my fiancé. He's fine, but the wedding is off. FML

#20812145
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61064) - you deserved it (4167)

On 07/30/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: