Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

jonnied23

Offline (the 02/07/2015 at 11:48pm) | Search for a member

jonnied23

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 23 June 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6647
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

jonnied23's page activity

Visits<b>raven83</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 11:40am<b>Wondermage</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 6:21am<b>btob143</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 2:24am<b>LondonderryAir</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 7:58pm<b>hahatofunny</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 7:37pm<b>XQuartzX</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 5:35pm<b>Cmealons</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 4:45pm<b>xReDMemory</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 1:30pm<b>homes7d</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 5:20pm<b>allie2590</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 2:12am<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 6:07pm<b>AnOriginalName</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 7:57pm<b>fueledbyhate</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 11:02pm<b>WafflebotO_O</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 7:12am<b>jasonmar</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 6:41am<b>onlyme25</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 12:56am<b>NineInchSacks</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 7:26pm<b>kanuka</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 6:59pm

Liked!<b>homes7d</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 11:20pm

jonnied23's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of jonnied23's badges

jonnied23's favorite FMLs

Today, while reading an erotic story I was more excited that the author used a conjunctive adverb than the sexual content in the story. FML

#20456501
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28712) - you deserved it (11432)

On 01/13/2013 at 1:39am - intimacy - by frustrated - United States (Florida)

Today, while giving my girlfriend a back-rub, she moaned and commented, "If only you could fuck this well." FML

#20455279
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33313) - you deserved it (8299)

On 01/12/2013 at 12:57pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my husband and I finally agreed on something: marriage counseling. FML

#20455127
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28332) - you deserved it (5835)

On 01/12/2013 at 10:28am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my wife brought my 5-year-old daughter to visit me at the office. My boss has a speech impediment, and when she heard it, she exclaimed, "Hey my daddy can sound just like you! Show him daddy! Show him!" FML

#20454855
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20065) - you deserved it (40679)

On 01/12/2013 at 3:14am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, after a week of intense fighting, my girlfriend of 4 years and I hung out. She told me she loved me, and I pointed out that last week she said she was going to dump me. Without missing a beat, she replied, "Only to scare you into submission." FML

#20454746
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31379) - you deserved it (8060)

On 01/12/2013 at 1:32am - love - by thanksbabe - United States

Today, my dad was helping me move my stuff out. I'd asked my boyfriend to deal with my sex toys and lingerie, but still my dad showed up later at my new place, handed me a box full of them all, and simply said, "I don't want to know." FML

#20454623
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21639) - you deserved it (36559)

On 01/12/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by nean83 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, during an hour-long drive, my sister told me she's lost her "faith in humanity", because one of her friends bought his 8-year-old son an iPad. She uses this stupid expression all the time, and I got so pissed off that I forgot to brake at a red light, rear-ending the car in front of us. FML

#20454301
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10152) - you deserved it (46742)

On 01/11/2013 at 9:16pm - misc - by lostmyfaithinblowjobs (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was yet again asked to show my hall pass. I'm 23 and work at a middle school. I've worked here for the last five months, so not only do I look 13 years old, I'm also not memorable enough for my own coworkers to recognize me. FML

#20454196
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35884) - you deserved it (2780)

On 01/11/2013 at 8:11pm - work - by Can'tAgeOrMakeFriends (woman) - United States

Today, trying to be sweet, I told my girlfriend that I'm so happy we met one another. She muttered, "Well, that makes one of us." FML

#20453944
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29418) - you deserved it (2836)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:22pm - misc - by wtf did i do?? (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend of over a year told me he wanted to learn Korean before Spanish. Apparently, being able to sing along to Gangnam Style is more important to him than being able to speak with my family. FML

#20453278
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36900) - you deserved it (7113)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:24am - love - by Latina (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my hamster died. It climbed out of its cage and jumped off my dresser. Looking for condolences, I told my mom who replied, "If I lived in your room, I would have done it earlier." FML

#20453156
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28055) - you deserved it (7558)

On 01/11/2013 at 2:09am - animals - by deadhammy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I told my girlfriend that my identical twin and I are not in fact related, that he's adopted, and that the only reason we look exactly the same is because we eat and drink the same things. She actually believed it. FML

#20453003
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34070) - you deserved it (8973)

On 01/11/2013 at 12:20am - misc - by datingablonde - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I found out that my son told my daughter at some point that "real" name for Hershey's Kisses is "blowjobs." I found this out because at kindergarten she was asked what her favorite food was. The teacher wasn't happy when she called me. FML

#20452458
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32165) - you deserved it (2733)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:51pm - kids - by Grant - United States

Today, I waited over an hour for my bus. As I finally saw it approaching, I reached into my purse to grab my ticket. The lady next to me then gave the driver a hand signal to keep driving. FML

#20451303
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32800) - you deserved it (2656)

On 01/10/2013 at 1:13am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I caught my boyfriend wearing yoga pants and taking pictures of his butt to post on a "Girls in yoga pants" site. He saw my expression and said, "Nah, it's cool, I hid my junk so they'll think it's a chick!" FML

#20451178
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39256) - you deserved it (5393)

On 01/10/2013 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Amy (woman) - United States



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: