jonnied23

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Offline (the 04/20/2016 at 4:17pm)

jonnied23

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 23 June 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10784
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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jonnied23's page activity

Visits<b>maxthebigseal</b> - 9 hours ago<b>justin12211</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 2:59pm<b>AdamPractical</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 9:37am<b>doctor__who</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 11:47am<b>ScarletSarah</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 8:24pm<b>Val0</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 2:02pm<b>AChaoticFray</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 6:32pm<b>guss5441</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 1:47am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 4:34pm<b>tehman117</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 1:05am<b>jessal</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 7:32pm<b>cartoonboy</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 10:58pm<b>drego5</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 7:14pm<b>EnigMind</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 12:48pm<b>raven83</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 4:22am<b>Wondermage</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 6:21am<b>btob143</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 2:24am<b>LondonderryAir</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 7:58pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 10:34pm<b>cartoonboy</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 4:59am<b>drego5</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 1:14am<b>homes7d</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 11:20pm

jonnied23's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of jonnied23's badges

jonnied23's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw a woman breast feeding her child at the local park. That would have been just fine if the child wasn't at least 8 years old. FML

by TheLastSerenade / 01/23/2013 at 3:33am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a date with a co-worker I've been interested in for some time. The topic of discussion she chose over lunch: how she's living a double-life as an escort in Flint and that she thinks she's picked up an STD from unprotected sex. FML

by SonofDonald / 01/22/2013 at 12:20pm / United States / Love

Today, my mother burst into tears and hysterics when she found out my fiancée and I were not "pure" for our upcoming wedding. I'm 28, she's 27, and we've lived together for four years. FML

by deflower / 01/22/2013 at 3:09am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I had to drag my grandmother out of a store because she went up to a black family and started apologizing for slavery. FML

by daddy's girl / 01/21/2013 at 11:08pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband asked me to show him my boob. I began to pull the side of my shirt down when he said, "No, not that one, the big one." FML

by sarah6786 / 01/21/2013 at 9:27pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the gas station with my grandma. After I slid her card and began to pump, I convinced her that it was a lot easier and more convenient to pay at the pump with your credit card instead of paying inside. She yelled as I realized I went $20 over what she had to spend. FML

by sorrygranny / 01/21/2013 at 11:11am / United States / Money

Today, after applying for a job at a tanning salon, I was told they don't hire "naturally tan" people. I'm black. FML

by Anonymous / 01/21/2013 at 7:48am / United States (Maryland) / Work

Today, my hubby asked for a morning blow job, and I happily obliged. All was going great until he came and farted at the same time. I laughed and reassured him it was no big deal. He cried. FML

by airbiscuit / 01/21/2013 at 7:36am / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Intimacy

Today, I realised in the middle of my shift how useless my deodorant is in the stifling heatwave spreading through my country. It's no longer effective against my awful B.O., which is a problem because I'm a mascot, and my costume traps the smell inside like a portable toilet. FML

by Anonymous / 01/20/2013 at 5:13pm / Australia / Work

Today, my boyfriend of three days met up with me at the movie theater, sporting a crude tattoo of my face on his cheek, along with a love heart and the word "forever." Looks like I'm single again. FML

by maybe dead in a day / 01/20/2013 at 2:28pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, after an hour of crying over a guy I like, I put on some Adele and sang along. My mom quickly took notice and came to give me advice, which was to "get over it" because he doesn't want me, and that "masturbation beats relationships hands down." Gee, thanks mom. FML

by Anonymous / 01/20/2013 at 1:22pm / New Zealand (Waikato) / Love

Today, I found a lost dog and called the owner. When he arrived, I thought it would be cute to put the dog down so he would run back into his owner's arms, like in movies. As soon as I put the dog down, it ran away again. FML

by DrakeB / 01/20/2013 at 11:34am / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, I was discussing with my husband how it was time I stopped taking birth control so we could have a baby. He looked at me and said sincerely, "We're a little young to be having kids, don't you think?". He's 35 and I'm 32. FML

by StillTooYoung / 01/20/2013 at 8:13am / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, after a very heartfelt conversation with my mother, I promised her that I'd quit smoking. I walked in on her smoking my cigarettes an hour later. Her excuse was that she didn't want my money to have gone to waste. FML

by Anonymous / 01/19/2013 at 7:46pm / United Kingdom / Health

Today, I attended my aunt's open-casket funeral. My sister spent the first quarter of an hour neither grieving nor celebrating her life, but whining that the "cute" clothes my aunt was dressed in could have been handed down to her, instead of being "wasted". FML

by sophietr8 / 01/19/2013 at 3:38pm / Netherlands (Friesland) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.