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jonnied23

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jonnied23

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 23 June 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4612
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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jonnied23's page activity

Visits<b>homes7d</b> - 19 hours ago<b>allie2590</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 2:12am<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 6:07pm<b>AnOriginalName</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 7:57pm<b>fueledbyhate</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 11:02pm<b>WafflebotO_O</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 7:12am<b>jasonmar</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 6:41am<b>onlyme25</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 12:56am<b>NineInchSacks</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 7:26pm<b>kanuka</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 6:59pm<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 6:43pm<b>ArcheryCole99</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 6:29pm<b>auzieforever705</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 6:04pm<b>October3461</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 5:36pm<b>Spinofanatic</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 5:17pm<b>PunkySpunky78</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 4:58pm<b>RainbowShine</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 4:53pm<b>Elric97</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 4:46pm

Liked!<b>homes7d</b> - 13 hours ago

jonnied23's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of jonnied23's badges

jonnied23's favorite FMLs

Today, I was trying to be sexy in the bathtub for my boyfriend. I leaned back and caught my hair on fire with the candle. FML

#20818297
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43635) - you deserved it (14504)

On 08/03/2013 at 4:40am - love - by Msmerfner - United States (California)

Today, I showed the kids I was babysitting a picture of my daughter, and the little girl asked, "You have a baby in your belly?" I said, "No, she's not in my belly anymore," and the little girl replied, "But it's BIG," and patted my stomach. FML

#20817997
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43738) - you deserved it (7718)

On 08/03/2013 at 12:29am - kids - by kimm1993 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my wife of 12 years informed me that the only sexual activity she is interested in is foreplay, and she absolutely doesn't want to go any further than that anymore. FML

#20817944
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53322) - you deserved it (5046)

On 08/03/2013 at 12:01am - intimacy - by tigger2013 (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my son told his 8-year-old sister that since she swallowed an apple seed, that a tree is going to grow in her stomach and kill her. She's inconsolable and won't believe that she'll be fine, because "they say that to all the dying people on TV". FML

#20817414
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43509) - you deserved it (3896)

On 08/02/2013 at 5:54pm - kids - by ulisha5 (woman) - Bulgaria (Burgas)

Today, I attended the funeral of a close friend. Most of the other guests were openly grinning and joking around, and the guy in front of me kept muttering "that's what she said" during the eulogy. FML

#20817315
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45660) - you deserved it (2780)

On 08/02/2013 at 4:58pm - misc - by fuck people (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was buying ingredients for a salad. I had only picked up a few cucumbers, when an elderly lady came up to me and murmured, "Make sure you use lots of lube, or that'll hurt. Been there, sweetheart." What the HELL? FML

#20817265
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56774) - you deserved it (5519)

On 08/02/2013 at 4:23pm - misc - by um... what the fuck, miss? (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I finally felt ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. It all went great, until I tried putting the condom on him. In the process, I managed to nick his penis not once, but three times with my nails. His eyes brimmed with tears and he completely lost his erection. FML

#20817205
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46347) - you deserved it (25301)

On 08/02/2013 at 3:44pm - intimacy - by fuck but no fuck (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I turned 17. My parents completely forgot it was my birthday, and when I reminded them, my dad thought it was my 18th. He was ecstatic and mentioned that I can "finally get the hell out." FML

#20816873
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48058) - you deserved it (3066)

On 08/02/2013 at 11:29am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, after learning that my wife has been cheating on me, I decided to distract myself by playing The Sims. Not long after I began, my Sim's wife basically started cheating on him. FML

#20816365
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54360) - you deserved it (5768)

On 08/02/2013 at 1:03am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML

#20816318
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51724) - you deserved it (11182)

On 08/02/2013 at 12:39am - intimacy - by whyeventry? (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I tried to give my husband a striptease for his birthday. I wound up tripping over my own panties and nearly dislocating my shoulder. FML

#20815680
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42133) - you deserved it (8566)

On 08/01/2013 at 6:29pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Mexico (Distrito Federal)

Today, my husband begged me to go down on him while he sat on the toilet, taking a crap. He tried to convince me that we'd both somehow experience mind-blowing orgasms. FML

#20815318
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59232) - you deserved it (6545)

On 08/01/2013 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by countryblumpkin (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks gave me an ultimatum: marry her, or she kills herself. FML

#20814794
339 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67373) - you deserved it (5813)

On 08/01/2013 at 3:36am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while taking a walk in the forest, someone approached me and asked to borrow the knife I had clipped to my pocket. I happily obliged, assuming he just needed it as a tool. Instead, he used the knife to mug me, taking my cellphone and my wallet. I was robbed with my own knife. FML

Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML

#20813979
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54529) - you deserved it (5243)

On 07/31/2013 at 7:19pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)



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