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joker_smile_1313

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joker_smile_1313

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 2 February 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 911
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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joker_smile_1313's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:10pm<b>MorbidMalice</b> - the 12/05/2009 at 5:20am<b>johnjon</b> - the 07/13/2009 at 5:11am<b>ha</b> - the 06/17/2009 at 6:10am<b>mandyreid_</b> - the 06/15/2009 at 7:32pm<b>muffy_da_bear</b> - the 05/16/2009 at 10:03pm<b>Shanny</b> - the 04/19/2009 at 4:18pm<b>pickles86</b> - the 04/14/2009 at 4:18pm<b>Nottooeffed</b> - the 04/11/2009 at 2:58am<b>rosee143</b> - the 04/10/2009 at 2:48pm<b>amirn86</b> - the 04/08/2009 at 1:09am<b>KAiTC021</b> - the 04/07/2009 at 10:57pm<b>sweetheart5292</b> - the 04/07/2009 at 5:18pm<b>Creat1ve</b> - the 04/07/2009 at 3:54pm<b>kkkristennnn</b> - the 04/07/2009 at 9:29am<b>Ineffableturtle</b> - the 04/07/2009 at 12:16am<b>volcomhunn64</b> - the 04/06/2009 at 9:40pm<b>Chaith</b> - the 04/06/2009 at 6:04pm

joker_smile_1313's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

joker_smile_1313's favorite FMLs

Today, I made a patient really happy. I work in a long term care facility and was changing a woman's diaper. While cleaning her, I somehow managed to give her an orgasm with a warm wash cloth. FML

#2850957
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67424) - you deserved it (4379)

On 06/13/2009 at 2:40am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

#503348
879 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60472) - you deserved it (634234)

On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I saw an attractive man outside the club I was trying to get into to. We talked, and ended up having sex in my apartment. The next day when I was dropping him off, I discovered he was homeless and was outside the club begging for money. My house is suddenly out of bread and cheese. FML

#448904
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31821) - you deserved it (139500)

On 03/18/2009 at 8:10pm - intimacy - by Melaknee (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I yelled at my spouse in front of 20 guests for not coming to blow out his birthday cake candles. Turns out he was in the other room, quietly changing his disabled friend's diaper. FML

#319539
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18329) - you deserved it (190633)

On 03/14/2009 at 11:16am - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I decided it would be pretty amusing to press the "Like" button on everyone's status on Facebook without reading them just to get on peoples' nerves. After re-reading them later, I found out one of them said "I MISS YOU SOO MUCH GRANDMOM. RIP". I liked that her grandmother died. FML

#316205
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22095) - you deserved it (187346)

On 03/14/2009 at 1:50am - misc - by like - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I called a priest "lame". He responded jokingly with "God will smite you!" I laughed and walked out the door. I tripped and broke my ankle. FML

#280211
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33208) - you deserved it (96826)

On 03/12/2009 at 8:07am - health - by lolzor (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML

#161178
999 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71363) - you deserved it (746356)

On 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm - misc - by ihavepinkbackpac (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my teacher confiscated my cell phone for text messaging. He said he would give it back if the next text that I would receive was important. I prayed the guy I've been texting didn't send the dick pic he said he was going to. He did. FML

#160435
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27707) - you deserved it (95967)

On 02/28/2009 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by textfail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went in for my 2nd day working at my internship. My bosses greeted me and told me we were going to have a meeting. The meeting was to listen to the drunk voicemails I left them on Saturday. FML

#53082
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10417) - you deserved it (70672)

On 02/16/2009 at 1:23pm - work - by Noname (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband found the box my morning after pill came in. He had a vasectomy 10 years ago. FML

#18272
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34171) - you deserved it (448797)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:46pm - intimacy - by apricot (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, whilst reading all 15 pages of this site, my French girlfriend asked me over my shoulder for translations, such as "What is buttsex?", "What is wanking?", and "What means farted?" FML

#513
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22649) - you deserved it (5856)

On 12/14/2008 at 8:14am - intimacy - by james - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I surprise my girlfriend by turning up at her flat on her twenty-fourth birthday. She gets up from the couch as I enter and I shout: "Tonight, my cock is going to stab you twenty-four times!" (Okay, that's not smart). That's when her father glances over from the couch and greets me. FML

#509
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10802) - you deserved it (59215)

On 12/13/2008 at 10:58pm - intimacy - by Mateo - Sent from mobile version

Today, whilst chatting with my mum on MSN, she unintentionally sent me an animated emoticon of a penis jerking off repeatedly. I don't even want to know the type of conversation she was having. FML

#375
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36785) - you deserved it (2348)

On 11/23/2008 at 4:24am - intimacy - by Dina - Sent from mobile version



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