johnnynumnuts

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Offline (the 05/01/2016 at 5:29pm)

johnnynumnuts

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johnnynumnutsjohnnynumnuts
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 18 June 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1435
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About johnnynumnuts : Louisville, Kentucky.

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johnnynumnuts's page activity

Visits<b>Kitteh8601</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 12:50am<b>_itsbridgett</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 9:15pm<b>samanthaelena</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 6:03pm<b>neneluvsyooh</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 11:45pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 1:12am<b>jadeluv</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 2:11am<b>princesskammm</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 9:42am<b>tpagacz</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 1:33am<b>reaaaagan6</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 12:41am<b>Mons</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 12:24am<b>shufflyn</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 10:09am<b>violentsneezes</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 11:13pm<b>lchollett</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 9:27pm<b>ginnyboo</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 12:09am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 11:15pm<b>mallaryheintz</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 9:33pm<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 8:24am<b>RandEm2497</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 8:58pm

Fucked!<b>Kitteh8601</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 12:10am<b>_itsbridgett</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 3:16am<b>neneluvsyooh</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 4:38am<b>violentsneezes</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 8:16pm<b>ginnyboo</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 6:09am<b>lchollett</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 2:35am<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 7:11am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 4:48am

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johnnynumnuts's favorite FMLs

Today, my hubby asked for a morning blow job, and I happily obliged. All was going great until he came and farted at the same time. I laughed and reassured him it was no big deal. He cried. FML

by airbiscuit / 01/21/2013 at 7:36am / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2013 at 5:50am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I went on a date. He stole my credit card. FML

by elphi / 12/15/2012 at 1:11am / United States (Illinois) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I dutifully attended my husband's local gig at a coffee shop. I thus found out, through song, about my husband's affair, in front of about 100 people. All of whom we both know. FML

by leannez / 12/05/2012 at 12:35am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

by SebastianMiko / 11/09/2012 at 2:18am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, my boyfriend actually held onto my love handles while we were having sex. He said they "made it easier." FML

by chunkymonkey / 08/24/2012 at 9:53am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was in the shower, when I heard my daughter scream and shout, "Mommy, mommy! Help! Come quick!" I panicked and rushed downstairs without even looking for a towel to cover myself, all so I could find out she'd just gotten a piece of dirt on her shoe. FML

by Sh*t / 07/02/2012 at 5:17pm / Venezuela (Distrito Federal) / Kids

Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML

by habbsrule / 06/15/2012 at 10:21am / Canada / Kids

Today, while hiking and wearing sandals, I stubbed my toe. This wouldn't have been so bad had it not been into a cactus with 3 inch thorns. FML

by Anon / 03/23/2012 at 10:42pm / United States / Health

Today, I sneezed while at the office. I felt snot shoot out, but I couldn't see anything on the tissue. I ignored it and went on with my day. When I went to the bathroom hours later, I noticed a huge wad of snot had dried onto the front of my shirt. No one told me about it. FML

by breebree-0 / 03/04/2012 at 2:36pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I took off my sweatshirt in the middle of class. The tanktop I was wearing underneath went with it. FML

by Anonymous / 02/02/2012 at 11:23pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I passed out in the shower with my boyfriend. He just left me there. FML

by soawkward / 01/26/2012 at 2:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, in the spirit of Christmas, I let a spider live in my room. I normally kill them, because I'm scared of waking up with one on my face. I woke up with it on my face. FML

by Anonymous / 12/28/2011 at 12:03pm / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Miscellaneous

Today, I popped a boner while my braces were being tightened. FML

by Anonymous / 11/21/2011 at 5:39pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, my mother panicked and was about to report me missing when I didn't answer her calls while I was at a movie. I'm 31, and have lived on my own for over 10 years. FML

by maf811 / 11/07/2011 at 7:13am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous