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johnnybros8

Offline (the 08/29/2014 at 5:35am) | Search for a member

johnnybros8

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johnnybros8's favorite FMLs

Today, while in the yard, my 18-month-old son decided to take off running into the road, where a car was driving. I rushed after him, only for one of my dress straps to suddenly break without warning. It must have looked like I was trying to flag down the driver with my flailing tit. FML

#21183414
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42152) - you deserved it (5613)

On 06/21/2014 at 7:14pm - misc - by icandothecancan - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take our relationship to the next level. I assumed since we live together that he meant marriage. I was wrong; the next level is me jacking him off with my feet. FML

#21069326
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50499) - you deserved it (6680)

On 02/23/2014 at 12:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

#19264126
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28001) - you deserved it (5915)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by yamsterr (man) - United States

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML

#17589386
676 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30142) - you deserved it (49150)

On 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm - kids - by f*ckingdisgusted - United States

Today, I found out my dad ate my pet rabbit two years ago. He said he ran away. FML

#14847630
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47008) - you deserved it (3697)

On 02/05/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was about to lose my virginity. I couldn't get it up. FML

#14070837
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46452) - you deserved it (10109)

On 12/03/2010 at 11:19am - intimacy - by flopsy - Australia

Today, while in bed with my game obsessed girlfriend, she told me I was a "noob" in bed. FML

#8455591
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18271) - you deserved it (5852)

On 02/19/2010 at 8:47pm - intimacy - by anonymous - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend watching a home made sex tape he had previously made with his ex-girlfriend. What's worse than him jerking off to it? He was crying and hugging a pillow. FML

#7811688
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31567) - you deserved it (2606)

On 02/02/2010 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was hanging out at my school with some friends when my mom came to pick me up. A girl I knew wanted a hug before I left. I turned around to hug her and a clip on my backpack got stuck on her tank top. I tuned away the clip pulled the shirt ripping it and exposing her naked chest. FML

#1342086
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63578) - you deserved it (7936)

On 04/26/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by Mikey (man) - United States (Illinois)



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