johnnie254

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Offline (the 10/11/2015 at 11:03pm)

johnnie254

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 986
  • Number of comments : 150
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About johnnie254 : Facebook URL: jontayloristheunsunghero

Reverbnation.com/taylorbloom

johnnie254's page activity

Visits<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 12:50pm<b>Sp1k3FML</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 5:00pm<b>cameronphillips</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 3:25pm<b>aha_awkward_</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 6:14pm<b>Krystal3408</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 1:05am<b>billionair11</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 12:42am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 7:10pm<b>DJLag</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 4:40pm<b>mitchellmarine</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 1:00am<b>lawl_cats</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 7:30pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 6:34pm<b>TotallyTrudy</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 1:09pm<b>egc573</b> - the 07/01/2012 at 1:12am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 5:39am<b>emotive</b> - the 12/28/2010 at 2:55am<b>Flutist</b> - the 12/24/2010 at 1:59pm<b>DocBastard</b> - the 12/24/2010 at 8:25am<b>Doortje</b> - the 12/24/2010 at 7:54am

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johnnie254's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out I'm going to be a grandfather. I'm 29, my son is 13 and the girl in question is 16. FML

by young grandpa / 06/17/2013 at 6:49pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I work by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated I started to moan and say dirty things. Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML

by MissCan'tKeepAJob / 08/23/2011 at 12:18pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, a man with a face like a corpse's shoe started talking to me in the long queue at the Post Office. Apparently, his mother invented the banana, and he's first in line for the throne in France if ever Prince Harry dies. And his breath smelled like Satan's ass gas. FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2011 at 12:48am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was caught and fined for picking a lock. I have OCD. I was picking the padlock on a toilet paper holder in a public toilet because the roll was the wrong way round. FML

by Anon / 08/16/2011 at 2:27am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my little brother proudly informed me that he found a way to suck pool water up his asshole. FML

by Gross... / 08/16/2011 at 2:22am / United States (Arizona) / Kids

Today, I killed a centipede. Now every little itch I feel, I think it's the centipede's spirit coming back to haunt me. FML

by ElixirRose / 07/20/2011 at 8:36am / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML

by knolan / 07/20/2011 at 12:40am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I told my boyfriend to stop tickling me, since I absolutely hate being tickled. He got extremely pissed at me and left the room. It took me a full five minutes to realize that I'd called him by my ex's name. FML

by sarahbeth93 / 07/20/2011 at 12:07am / United States (Mississippi) / Love

Today, I found myself crying for an hour when my recreated crush on The Sims 3 game rejected my character and ran off with someone else. FML

by Nxydolli / 04/29/2011 at 3:34pm / United Kingdom (Durham) / Geek

Today, a tornado watch has been instituted in my town. At this moment, I have violent diarrhea, and my toilet sits right in front of a window. FML

by cnamobi / 04/28/2011 at 12:51pm / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, my drunk dad started yelling at my dog for not having a job. FML

by Cecilly2010 / 04/28/2011 at 11:53am / Animals

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend and told him how smitten I was with him. He responded by giving me a wedgie. FML

by :( / 04/27/2011 at 2:54am / Love

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

by Mike / 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm / Health

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

by Mike / 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm / Health

Today, without even trying, I convinced my 17-year-old daughter that blueberries are just peas holding their breath. I have raised a complete airhead. FML

by parentfail / 12/11/2010 at 9:44am / United Kingdom / Kids