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About joe_l_paso : Hello .....
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9376) - you deserved it (867)
On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)
Today, I found out my best friend was having a birthday party and I wasn't invited, so I asked her why. She replied, "what birthday party?" It was a surprise birthday party. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2168) - you deserved it (6475)
On 05/15/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, my fiancé got drunk at our wedding reception and announced to his and my family what we do in bed. And it was pretty detailed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5553) - you deserved it (828)
On 05/12/2012 at 1:27am - intimacy - by crazyman. - United States (Texas)
Today, I took a picture in front of my bathroom mirror and posted it on Facebook. When I checked it later, it had 20 comments on the picture. I was feeling good until I read the comments and looked at the picture again. I left my vibrator on the the bathroom counter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1820) - you deserved it (10505)
On 05/12/2012 at 12:24am - intimacy - by Hunter101 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6066) - you deserved it (1653)
On 05/11/2012 at 6:02pm - intimacy - by 504-A1 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, while showering with my boyfriend, he asked if something was weird about his penis. Naturally, I looked closer. As soon as I did, he sprayed my face with urine. This is only the beginning; we just moved in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10412) - you deserved it (1959)
On 05/07/2012 at 5:42am - intimacy - by quirrus (woman) - United States
Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (3336) - you deserved it (14333) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I visited my gynecologist. As she had her fingers inside me she decided that was the perfect time to say, "I absolutely love your socks!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (5729) - you deserved it (845)
On 03/31/2012 at 12:22am - health - by GetHardOrGoHome - United States (Ohio)
Today, my grandfather proudly informed me that the dump he'd just took looked like a tiger claw. He announced this during dinner, and told us not to flush it until he could take a picture. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5633) - you deserved it (498)
On 03/29/2012 at 11:19am - misc - by a - United States
Today, I got my foot stuck in the car seat belt. I kept pulling to loosen it up but it just kept getting tighter till my foot was in the air, so I started panicking and eventually started crying. My boyfriend had to pull over and save me from a seat belt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2118) - you deserved it (5691)
On 03/29/2012 at 2:33am - misc - by greeneyedpothead - United States (California)
Today, my professor called me out in the middle of a lecture to ask why I was bleeding. I then had to explain to him, in front of around one hundred of my fellow classmates, that my largest zit had burst. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6735) - you deserved it (583)
On 03/29/2012 at 12:45am - health - by Jayne - United States
Today, I discovered that the stream of water that periodically falls onto the ground outside my apartment window isn't actually water. The guy above me regularly pees out of his window onto his balcony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6004) - you deserved it (412)
On 03/28/2012 at 8:44pm - misc - by deadgrass (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, the magic of witnessing a sheep giving birth was ruined for me when I slipped and fell in the puddle of birth fluids. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6262) - you deserved it (1331)
On 03/28/2012 at 2:02pm - animals - by 3hoursleftofwork (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)
Today, one of my nostrils became completely blocked. At lunch time, I went out to my car to dig into my nose. When I finished, I held up the cornflake sized booger in victory. I noticed too late that my boss was in a car adjacent to me, shooting me a horrified look. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2504) - you deserved it (6064)
On 03/28/2012 at 12:25pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I was leaning over a fence in a pasture to get a closer look at something. Nobody warned my nuts that it was an electric fence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12902) - you deserved it (6481)
On 03/27/2012 at 1:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)
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