Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

jociecole

Search for a member

jociecole

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 January 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1217
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About jociecole : i am a sweeter version of my twin my sister we are inseparable.i can be a bitch sometimes but only when people act stupid.
MUSIC=LIFE!!!!

jociecole's page activity

Visits<b>I_Mustache_You</b> - the 08/10/2012 at 1:53am<b>FMLDrummerBoy</b> - the 02/03/2012 at 8:34pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:55pm<b>bookb2535</b> - the 05/22/2011 at 7:10pm<b>lxclark</b> - the 04/03/2011 at 8:01pm<b>DanielleTheOne</b> - the 01/20/2011 at 7:36pm<b>XxTyler_14xX</b> - the 12/23/2010 at 3:19am<b>QWERTYCommander</b> - the 10/14/2010 at 5:24pm<b>wednesdeyy</b> - the 09/13/2010 at 8:59pm<b>bloodshot7x</b> - the 09/12/2010 at 4:44am<b>ShootinPutin</b> - the 09/06/2010 at 9:09pm<b>ugh_a_lug</b> - the 08/28/2010 at 12:20am<b>threeseventyfive</b> - the 08/19/2010 at 11:30pm<b>Sargon_of_Akkad</b> - the 08/19/2010 at 3:37pm<b>Torpex</b> - the 07/23/2010 at 6:24pm<b>mszidqaf94</b> - the 07/12/2010 at 5:07pm<b>wehaveourmoments</b> - the 07/04/2010 at 2:15am<b>NiceGuyz</b> - the 07/01/2010 at 12:26pm

jociecole's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of jociecole's badges

jociecole's favorite FMLs

Today, I got into my car after a long shift at work. When I looked in my rear view mirror, a horrifyingly evil face grinned at me from the back window. I leaped out of the car, only to be chased around by two people in clown masks. It turned out to be a prank set up by my co-workers. FML

#18112365
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26800) - you deserved it (2889)

On 10/30/2011 at 3:13pm - work - by Katrin - Norway

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years felt comfortable enough with me to disclose that he had previously spent 4 years in a mental institute because he tried to kill his mother. He also told me we will be together forever. I'm scared. FML

#18005142
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50970) - you deserved it (4721)

On 10/17/2011 at 6:02am - love - by bubba - China

Today, I was watching my cousin shoot at targets on hay bales with his plastic pellet BB gun. After my sister asked him if it would hurt to be shot with one, my cousin smiled at her and said, "Ask your sister" as he shot me in the leg. I think my screaming was obvious enough. It hurts. FML

#17995977
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25428) - you deserved it (2749)

On 10/16/2011 at 3:06am - misc - by ThanksChris (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, since I was taking a dump in my wife's parents' house, I lit a candle so that it wouldn't stink. While still sitting down, I went to blow it out and apparently, no matter how strong of a man you are, you will still scream like a little girl if hot wax falls on your penis. FML

#17981787
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31951) - you deserved it (10521)

On 10/14/2011 at 11:23am - intimacy - by cduran2011 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had to explain to a patient that no, her nipples were not slowly getting smaller. FML

#17958269
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17907) - you deserved it (1881)

On 10/11/2011 at 5:43am - work - by Anony-moose (woman) - United States

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

#17953738
432 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30793) - you deserved it (22507)

On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I took my friend with me for a radiology scan. While I was getting injections, my friend muttered, "On the bright side, if you die, you'll glow in the dark at the funeral." FML

#17952453
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21580) - you deserved it (2972)

On 10/10/2011 at 3:06pm - health - by radioactiveglowinthedarkthing (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I spent about 10 minutes searching frantically for my cell phone, while holding it up to my ear and talking to my friend about my plans tonight. FML

#17934775
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9025) - you deserved it (35516)

On 10/08/2011 at 11:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my new coworker asked if I knew her daughter. I responded yes and asked how her pregnancy was going. She didn't know her daughter was pregnant. FML

#17920889
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35633) - you deserved it (5840)

On 10/06/2011 at 4:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, in an incredibly busy shopping center bathroom with my 5 year-old niece, I was squatting over the toilet seat to avoid germs. My niece then says at the top of her voice, "Auntie, why are you sitting like a kangaroo?" I'd say the whole room pissed their pants laughing. FML

#17910752
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21496) - you deserved it (7334)

On 10/05/2011 at 11:29am - kids - by Pissed (woman) - Australia

Today, after reading about seduction techniques, I wore shades and a brightly colored shirt to a club to attract female attention. However, the sunglasses rendered me almost blind, and I tripped over a step, crashed into tables, and thanks to the shirt, everyone saw it happen in glorious technicolor. FML

#17891002
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7918) - you deserved it (38039)

On 10/02/2011 at 9:34pm - misc - by hardtoignore - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting frisky. She got my cock out, stopped, and told me it looked like "Rufus the naked mole rat." She spent the next 20 minutes showing me pictures, describing in detail why they looked similar, and laughing. FML

#17889582
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32409) - you deserved it (4119)

On 10/02/2011 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by rufusthepenis - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
390 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84192) - you deserved it (12833)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my son was eating a plum. I was busy in the kitchen, and he came running in saying "Mummy my plum is wet", I told him it was fine and bit a bit off to prove it. He looked at me and said "No Mummy! Can you wash it please, I dropped it in my potty". I feel ill. FML

#17606704
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29865) - you deserved it (8546)

On 08/28/2011 at 5:25pm - kids - by cjay2200 - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, while walking in the city with my little sister, she let go of my hand. Not wanting to lose her, I quickly tried to grab it back. That resulted in me grabbing some 50 year old man's junk. FML

#17408229
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33377) - you deserved it (5699)

On 08/08/2011 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by Sharee K. - United States (New Jersey)



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: