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jmar411

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jmar411

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1554
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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jmar411's page activity

Visits<b>LissaMccracken</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 11:18am<b>simmyiphone</b> - the 05/27/2013 at 5:33pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 8:23pm<b>LovesSushi</b> - the 04/18/2013 at 3:54am<b>cosicosei</b> - the 04/05/2013 at 9:33pm<b>lonewolf621</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 3:44pm<b>cliostyle</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 1:52pm<b>dmoran20</b> - the 02/11/2013 at 3:25am<b>Dracospinks</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 5:24pm<b>moksha</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 3:29am<b>sarkaar</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 12:42am<b>Chyl</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 3:58pm

jmar411's FML badges

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That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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jmar411's favorite FMLs

Today, my school took part in a standardized state test. After finishing, I decided to take a nap, only to be awoken by the test monitor, who wanted me to leave. Apparently, I was ferociously farting in my sleep and was disturbing the people still taking the test. FML

#20618481
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56765) - you deserved it (12730)

On 04/24/2013 at 3:14pm - misc - by Skyler - United States

Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML

#20599244
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49827) - you deserved it (8177)

On 04/17/2013 at 12:13pm - kids - by my dumb bro - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my cat learned how to open doors. Ever since then she's been running up to my room, opening my door, and running away. My cat is playing ding-dong ditch. FML

#20559057
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33198) - you deserved it (4460)

On 03/25/2013 at 3:18am - animals - by Apes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while working, I thought, "I wish my kittens could text so I can talk to them throughout the day." And then I realized, I'm that cat lady you read about. FML

#20532138
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31399) - you deserved it (12369)

On 03/05/2013 at 11:13am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, my friends confronted me and told me that they no longer want to visit my house because my dog smells really disgusting. I didn't have the heart to tell them that the smell is actually my parents, who have been trying to "save water" by only showering once a fortnight. FML

#20525408
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31129) - you deserved it (2686)

On 02/28/2013 at 5:56am - misc - by sickofthesmelltoo (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I walked outside to this guy attempting to steal my bike. When I asked him what he was doing he calmly replied, "I'm a bike inspector. You hooked your chain all wrong! This time is a warning; next time it'll be a ticket!" He then threw his full, opened Pepsi can at me. FML

#20524651
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27582) - you deserved it (2259)

On 02/27/2013 at 5:39pm - misc - by Chelsea - United States (Ohio)

Today, my father gave me his blessing to be married on one condition: that I keep my maiden name when I marry. My fiancé thought it would be "epic". My last name will be hyphenated to Cobb-Webb. FML

#20509329
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31930) - you deserved it (5453)

On 02/16/2013 at 10:27am - love - by MsCobb - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got a text from an unknown number saying, "You shouldn't be eating that." I was eating a piece of chocolate, cheating on my diet. FML

#20480667
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30243) - you deserved it (17030)

On 01/27/2013 at 12:38am - misc - by LucidNightmare - United States (Colorado)

Today, my kitten tried jumping into a hot oven, a dryer, a dishwasher, a toilet, and a fish-tank. Curiosity is going to kill my cat. FML

#20470154
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31534) - you deserved it (3235)

On 01/20/2013 at 8:47pm - animals - by AnonCat (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

#20448629
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34221) - you deserved it (2765)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML

#20442461
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18742) - you deserved it (6667)

On 01/04/2013 at 11:59am - kids - by Raela (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my neighbor went on vacation, leaving me in charge of his cat and dog. For some reason, he calls his dog "Cat" and his cat "Dog". There are two pet food containers, one labeled "Cat" and the other labeled "Dog". I have no idea which one goes to which animal. FML

#20437796
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37758) - you deserved it (4004)

On 01/02/2013 at 1:07am - animals - by catdog - United States (California)

Today, I received a "get well soon" card in the mail, which I found just a little odd, since I was feeling completely fine. Not an hour later, I tripped and fell down a flight of stairs. FML

#19981576
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25243) - you deserved it (2071)

On 07/24/2012 at 1:36pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. FML

#19959638
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23933) - you deserved it (5463)

On 07/19/2012 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by cortanaisahobot - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mum bought a phone. Since teaching her how to text, I have received 27 messages, repeatedly saying the word "penis". FML

#19505040
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21830) - you deserved it (4177)

On 04/21/2012 at 5:26am - misc - by jaderie - Australia (New South Wales)



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