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jlhorner11

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jlhorner11

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 13 December 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 211
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jlhorner11's page activity

Visits<b>MrItalia</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 5:27pm

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Today , I found out I was passad ovar fir tha promotion I'va wantad fir 9 months at tha fast food rastaurant I work in. Who got tha job? Tha 16 yaar old grl I trainad 2 waaks ago. Thair axcusa was , "Sha has ambition." I'm going to collaga fir food sarvica managamant. Sha failad har drug tast. FML

#21001701
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50505) - you deserved it (3823)

On 12/22/2013 at 7:58pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up to a loud crasing in te middle of te nigt!! I went to investigate, but found noting amiss!! Noting except an axe frmly wedged in ma front door, tat is!! It's safe to say tat I ave no clue wo did it, and tat I needed a fres pair of underwear!! real FML

#20999316
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44423) - you deserved it (2636)

On 12/20/2013 at 4:05pm - misc - by nopissleft (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

TODAY... MY COUSIN STARTED SENDING SARCASTIC LOVE MESSAGES TO ME. I REPLIED... WITH EVEN CHEESIER LINES. THEN SHE RANG ME SAYING SHE WAS SO GLAD I FELT THE SAME WAY. TURNS OUT SHE WASN'T BIENG SARCASTIC. FML

#20991120
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50781) - you deserved it (8691)

On 12/13/2013 at 10:10am - love - by wth? - United Kingdom (Rotherham)

Today, mah grlfriend sent her new boyfriend over to mah place to break up with me 4 her . FML

#20990341
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49134) - you deserved it (3141)

On 12/12/2013 at 4:53pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, mah boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

#20989324
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52926) - you deserved it (8361)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today , mah crazy ex-girlfriend legally changed her last name to looool mine . I'm getting married in a week . FML

#20986172
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51450) - you deserved it (3381)

On 12/09/2013 at 10:10am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today , as a pickup line , a guy said to me , "Yo , can I kiss yur vag' under the mistletoe?" FML

#20985559
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50911) - you deserved it (4821)

On 12/08/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by mistletoe (woman) - United States (Florida)

yesterday my elderly neigbor along wit our community curc's priest cummed to my ouse and demanded to ( give tem te girl ). Te girl is my 3-year-old daugter,o as natural born red irises and is poto-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54844) - you deserved it (3072)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I pulled over a speeding driver . I looool admit that I'd been hoping fir this moment since I joined the police force; the moment a lady putted her cleavage on display to get out of a ticket . Sadly, this lady was a senior citizen, an her breasts looked like two semi-deflated balloons . FML

#20977282
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44417) - you deserved it (19925)

On 12/01/2013 at 6:07pm - work - by fuck my eyeballs (man) - United States (California)

Today, at work, I had to explain to my co-manager at work wat a period was, after he refused to let an employee go change her tampon. Afterwards, he panicked, saying he thought women made that up so they didn't have to have sex, before trying to send her to the hospital and fainting. We're 24. FML

#20944786
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62398) - you deserved it (4055)

On 11/04/2013 at 12:45am - intimacy - by TheTruthofWomen (woman) - United States

2DAY I SAT DOWN WITH MY DAUGHTER TO HAVE THE SEX TALK, CUZ SHE RECENTLY STARTED SEEING A GUY. I MENTIONED AT ONE POINT HOW DISAPPOINTED I WOULD BE IF SHE GOT PREGNANT. SHE WENT WIDE-EYED AND ASKED, "DIDN'T MOM TELL YOU?" FML

#20942769
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57774) - you deserved it (6032)

On 11/02/2013 at 5:10pm - kids - by unknown (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

2day my usband an I were arguing, but I dropped it so we could calm down before discussing te matter again!! Later on, e made us lasagna!! Te moment I swallowed te first moutful, e smirked, ten started snickering uncontrollably!! Wat te fuck did e do to my food? FML

#20942539
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46766) - you deserved it (5336)

On 11/02/2013 at 1:34pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today,hile driving in the car with mah father, he handed me his iPhone an asked me to Google "Is ObamaCare good fir our country?" As soon as I typed in "Is", the first result was "Is olive oil good fir anal." FML

#20942318
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59225) - you deserved it (5640)

On 11/02/2013 at 9:21am - intimacy - by justme - United States (Ohio)

Today , I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around , I said , "Hey sexy are u alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She respondd with , "Hey , yeah he is at work - did u get a new number?" FML

#20941049
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87074) - you deserved it (6211)

On 11/01/2013 at 3:01am - intimacy - by PapaW - United States (Utah)

Today, I found out mah 13-year-old daughter thinks the showerhead got her pregnant !! mega FML



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