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jkw11d

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jkw11d

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 11 September 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 431
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jkw11d's page activity

Visits<b>frankiero</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 9:12am<b>marykaitlyn</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 11:42pm<b>QU33NOFAWKWARD</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 10:04pm<b>Tessa_11</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 5:56pm<b>TheRandomIndian</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 6:31am<b>flatout4</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 3:10pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 4:43am<b>raisingbears</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 12:22am<b>Skittles_Wiki</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 9:49am<b>LivexForever21</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 9:00pm<b>itsnicole96</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 8:54pm<b>CallMeWindSock</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 7:26pm<b>roro_superloser</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 6:18pm<b>dandee_one</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 6:09pm<b>herecomestheboom</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 5:43pm<b>Verifications</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 5:04pm<b>dinosxxrawr</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 2:59am<b>jonsmith01973</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 7:29pm

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jkw11d's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to explain to my brother why it's not OK to stick his knob in the toaster. FML

#20893446
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38775) - you deserved it (2971)

On 09/23/2013 at 8:05pm - kids - by latter - United States (Maryland)

Today, I walked in the bathroom to find my son cleaning his penis. It wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't cleaning it with a toothbrush. FML

#20883448
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42109) - you deserved it (3848)

On 09/16/2013 at 3:51am - kids - by clean - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was talking to my husband about our favorite TV show, when he took my face in his hands and sweetly whispered, "You're so pretty. Why must you ruin it with words?" FML

#20880791
102 comments

Today, a man walked into the bank I work at and asked what he would need in order to open an account. I had to look him in the eyes with a straight face, say, "Two pieces of identification," and ask him to put some pants on. FML

#20880767
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36639) - you deserved it (2640)

On 09/14/2013 at 11:04am - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out why we've had to replace 3 washing machines this year. My sister thinks that "huge capacity" means "load the washing machine until no more clothes will fit." It blows the motor every time. She's 31. FML

#20806007
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47147) - you deserved it (3745)

On 07/27/2013 at 5:26am - misc - by kilamo80 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML

#20798640
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56141) - you deserved it (11978)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:04am - intimacy - by suckstosuck (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57142) - you deserved it (6781)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

#20785133
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59504) - you deserved it (20995)

On 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm - intimacy - by needsnewshorts (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 15-year-old daughter's pregnancy test came back positive. I wanted to know who the father is, so I could sit the two of them down to talk the situation through with them. She isn't sure if it's her best friend, or our neighbor's son. FML

#20777059
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62505) - you deserved it (10840)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:19am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was going to fight the guy who my girlfriend left me for. While waiting at the park, he sent me a video of the two of them having sex on my bed. FML

#20768398
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65688) - you deserved it (21367)

On 07/07/2013 at 8:35am - love - by SimG (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my brother called me, asking if I could help him do his taxes. Since he's a high school and college dropout, I thought all I had to do was a 1040EZ. No, last year he made more than twice what I earn, through self-employment. I have two Master's degrees and work at Burger King. FML

#20527434
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33036) - you deserved it (8090)

On 03/01/2013 at 9:35pm - misc - by tax-man - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex when the condom broke. He told me to go put a tampon in to "soak up the kids". How did he graduate? FML

#20186465
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42893) - you deserved it (6707)

On 12/01/2012 at 9:54am - intimacy - by me. - United States

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

#20163281
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47332) - you deserved it (6013)

On 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend snapped at me for being lazy and incompetent, and declared that if I was going to behave like a child, she would be treating me like one. This includes safety-proofing the house, talking to me like a 3-year-old and slapping me with a wooden spoon when I do something wrong. FML

#20162223
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7460) - you deserved it (29383)

On 11/13/2012 at 7:43pm - misc - by Z - Australia

Today, my college class was talking about Felix Baumgartner, who jumped from the edge of space down to earth. A boy suddenly put his head up and said in a serious tone, "I thought he jumped from the moon?" Several girls concurred. This is my generation. FML

#20121409
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24514) - you deserved it (1916)

On 10/17/2012 at 7:15pm - kids - by Mouse (woman) -



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