jku

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Offline (the 05/13/2014 at 9:14am)

jku

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1348
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 29 posted

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jku's page activity

Visits<b>wrock84</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 12:30am<b>saucybugger101</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 8:20pm<b>nevaryzarc</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 5:43am<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 11:18am<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 11:02am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 3:33am<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 2:36pm<b>MdMan2</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 1:49pm<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 12:00am<b>PickledSweets</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 4:45am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 3:21pm<b>Chilupa</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 1:54am<b>Epickiller</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 8:14pm<b>ButterflyHaze</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 8:06pm<b>ecot95</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 3:48pm<b>klisterable</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 5:34am<b>Ranch_Dressing</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 7:31pm<b>Robbieisadowg</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 7:25pm

Fucked!<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 9:33am<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 8:37pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 9:21pm

jku's FML badges

Follow up

You subsequently gave feedback by commenting on an FML that you’d submitted and was published.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

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jku's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML

by Devon / 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had diarrhea in a public bathroom. When I was finished, I noticed that someone had pissed all over the toilet paper. FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2011 at 1:26am / Health

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek

Today, I woke up at 3am to go to work. This will be my new routine from now on. FML

by yawning / 02/01/2011 at 3:14pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, my extremely lazy roommate is in bed with the flu. Instead of getting up to get water, he's run the garden hose through his window, and instead of going to the bathroom, he's connected a siphon to his penis and run it to a 5-gallon bucket. I have to live with this idiot. FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2011 at 1:35pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, I went out for New Year's. When I got back, I found my house had been broken into. I found a note saying, "Happy New Year, sucker." FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2011 at 12:29am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, after my marching band's performance, the girls had to change out of our uniforms in a very dark school bathroom. Someone turned on the lights and I realized that more than a dozen roaches had crawled into my skinny jeans. FML

by toazt / 10/10/2010 at 4:45am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a bad car wreck. I pulled over and ran to the car to find an unconscious man behind the wheel. Another car pulled up, and a guy got out. I was relieved to have help, until, to my horror, he started trying to hit on me. I was stuck with him until the ambulance arrived. FML

by badtiming / 09/15/2010 at 12:15am / United States / Love

Today, my physics teacher accidentally lit me on fire. FML

by human torch / 03/18/2010 at 11:22am / United States / Health

Today, I had to catch a shuttle bus. I awoke to the sound of a car horn. I ran out in my boxers and saw a bus take off down the road. I chased it, thinking I had missed my bus. I realized I hadn't only when I saw frightened kids in the back of the bus. FML

by militiousroflcopter / 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I was hit on by a guy who decided to use the line, "My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in." FML

by luckygirl / 12/14/2009 at 4:05am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my 50-year-old mother borrowed my denim miniskirt to go to the bar. In return, she offered to let me borrow her red "f*** me" pumps whenever I needed them. FML

by mvp / 07/26/2009 at 7:51pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I opened my lunch in front of my friends at university. I had a note in my lunch from my mother that said "Have a good day sweetie! - Love mom". I wrote that note, and put it in my lunch to impress my friends. FML

by sadlife / 07/09/2009 at 2:50pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was working a customer notified me that the men's restroom need some attention. Thinking that there was just a small mess, I walked into the restroom only to discover someone had taken a crap in the sink. Guess who got to clean it. FML

by KP / 06/25/2009 at 12:22pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, the cute boy in my biology class I had been crushing on invited me over to study for a huge test. Once I got to his house, I really had to use the bathroom. I ended ending up taking a huge dump and clogging up his toilet. He had to come plunge it for me. FML

by musicaddict / 03/10/2009 at 4:42pm / United States (Texas) / Love