jku

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Offline (the 05/13/2014 at 9:14am)

jku

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1237
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 29 posted

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jku's page activity

Visits<b>nevaryzarc</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 5:43am<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 11:18am<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 11:02am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 3:33am<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 2:36pm<b>MdMan2</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 1:49pm<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 12:00am<b>PickledSweets</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 4:45am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 3:21pm<b>Chilupa</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 1:54am<b>Epickiller</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 8:14pm<b>ButterflyHaze</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 8:06pm<b>ecot95</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 3:48pm<b>klisterable</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 5:34am<b>Ranch_Dressing</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 7:31pm<b>Robbieisadowg</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 7:25pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 7:29pm<b>MattOnFML</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 1:12pm

Fucked!<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 9:33am<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 8:37pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 9:21pm

jku's FML badges

Follow up

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Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

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jku's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to find myself a friend on Craigslist. FML

by shea234 / 02/20/2012 at 11:19am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I received a single, hand-made Valentine's card from the weirdest kid in the school. It said, "If you ever get mauled by a bear, I hope he doesn't damage your face." FML

by Jayde / 02/04/2012 at 12:12am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I happened to make eye contact with a stranger standing on a balcony of the apartment building across the train tracks from mine. He ran his finger across his neck like a knife and winked at me. I'm afraid to go out again. FML

by Dani / 01/12/2012 at 5:35am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I looked into my sink's garbage disposal for the first time since I moved in two months ago. Apparently, the putrid smell was not the food I've been throwing down it, but instead, a now what appears to be mutilated litter of rats. FML

by RatFailure / 01/11/2012 at 12:23am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while very sick, throwing up in a bucket beside my bed, my dad came in pushed my face into the bucket. For a laugh apparently. FML

by barface / 01/10/2012 at 9:52pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I went to my first class of the semester. After an hour of intense note writing, I realized I was in the wrong class. FML

by student414 / 01/10/2012 at 12:15pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Geek

Today, I received a string of blank texts from an unknown number. When I asked who it was, I got a list of every place I've been over the last three days. I'm scared to leave the house. FML

by liLbob6598 / 01/09/2012 at 9:34pm / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, while helping my father build a shelf, I suggested that we should probably use the instruction manual. He suggested I should probably shut the fuck up and do it his way. FML

by Jman6295 / 01/07/2012 at 7:12pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cooking with super hot ghost peppers. The package said "After handling them not to touch your eyes, nose or pets". They should've added "penis" to that list. FML

by Anonymous / 01/06/2012 at 9:22pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, I decided to write a romantic email to my boyfriend describing how much I love and miss him. An hour later, I got an email back saying, "I think we need to discuss this." It seems I sent it to my teacher by mistake. FML

by mjbx / 01/01/2012 at 2:02pm / United Kingdom (Peterborough) / Love

Today, my favorite fish died. To make things better my parents thought to take me out to dinner. We ate sushi. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2011 at 3:44am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend took me on a surprise date to an expensive restaurant. After the meal, he got down on his knee and proposed. We've only been dating for two weeks, so I said no. He just silently kept staring me in the eyes, no matter what I said or did. I ended up having to walk home. FML

by Storm / 09/22/2011 at 11:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I woke up at 7am next to the man I swore I'd never get intimate with again. After trying to get back to sleep despite my shame and disgust, he ripped the loudest fart ever. FML

by JJAnd / 08/28/2011 at 2:37am / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, thanks to my wife's confession, I found out that the 14 year old child I've raised since I was 16 isn't related to me at all. But at least this narrows the real father down to one of three other guys. FML

by candie / 08/26/2011 at 10:10pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, life gave me lemons, delivering them straight to my nuts via my neighbor's tennis ball shooter. FML

by Anonymous / 08/25/2011 at 12:24am / United States (California) / Health