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jkp1291

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jkp1291

7Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 392
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About jkp1291 : Blah Blah Blah

jkp1291's page activity

Visits<b>pipefitter69</b> - yesterday at 12:51am<b>maximus_prime</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 1:48pm<b>Coopercody</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 4:10pm<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 4:04pm<b>nphill82</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 9:52pm<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 8:04pm<b>frostownz33</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 10:47pm<b>briang959</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 9:27pm<b>DolphinLaser23</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 6:37pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 6:15pm<b>awkwarddebater</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 10:48pm<b>0mysteriousman0</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 10:13pm<b>17031990</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 7:54pm<b>Risea</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 7:51pm<b>ana_lee_bonde</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 6:47pm<b>imabossassbeach</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 5:29pm<b>silkyred</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 5:05pm<b>amandalynn84</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 2:50pm

Liked!<b>briang959</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 5:09pm<b>rieebee</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 3:31pm<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 2:06am<b>DolphinLaser23</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 1:22pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 1:17pm<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 11:57pm

jkp1291's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of jkp1291's badges

jkp1291's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband was involved in a horrible series of accidents; he repeatedly slipped and fell into my best friend's vagina. FML

#21382840
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29364) - you deserved it (1946)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:20am - intimacy - by soontobewidow (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, my mother worked out that my boyfriend and I are having sex. Instead of confronting me about it, she now just sits and stares at me judgmentally whenever I'm in the same room as her, making me feel incredibly uncomfortable. FML

#21376248
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29083) - you deserved it (5408)

On 03/17/2015 at 8:00am - intimacy - by distressed (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my dad turned off our cable. The reason? His favorite character from The Walking Dead died. FML

#21375425
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31746) - you deserved it (3066)

On 03/16/2015 at 12:37am - misc - by jfields2474 - United States (California)

Today, I was so drunk that I forgot how to use the key to my front door. But I knew how to break a window, get into my locked basement, and unlock the basement door with my front door's key. FML

#21374433
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22557) - you deserved it (15222)

On 03/14/2015 at 12:52pm - misc - by nomorealcoholeva - Norway (Nordland)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while walking my dog, we came across two men having a heated argument in the street. My dog decided the perfect place to poop was right next to them. He wouldn't budge no matter what. Meanwhile, one of the men pulled a knife, and I practically shat myself. FML

#21374140
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29554) - you deserved it (2434)

On 03/13/2015 at 11:30pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I jokingly sent my girlfriend a link to an article about giving better head. She didn't think it was funny, and has since sent me numerous articles about the female orgasm, and I just got a link to the Wikipedia article about the clitoris. FML

#21372045
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1) - you deserved it (45189)

On 03/10/2015 at 7:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams' phone number. After texting her "Hey, is this Stephanie?" I got response saying "Sorry bro, I know how you feel, she did the same thing to me." FML

#21371084
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35182) - you deserved it (2473)

On 03/09/2015 at 9:55am - love - by generic_name123 - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, at a big family dinner, my dad said, "Pfff, gays don't have it hard at all. The things a guy has to do for sex with a girl? Crazy. All a gay guy has to do for sex is become an altar boy!" My husband's side of the family is very religious, and all hell quickly broke loose. FML

#21369938
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32517) - you deserved it (3026)

On 03/07/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by killme (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I met my biological parents for the first time, 29 years into my life. They turned out to be two of the most pathetic people I have ever met, and the meeting ended after they asked me to lend them money because I "literally owe them my life." FML

#21364287
161 comments

Today, my boss used Siri to settle a debate we were having in our team meeting. Siri responded by calling him "Daddy". FML

Today, my fiance and his family accused me of being with him only because he's rich, refusing to go ahead with the wedding. I accepted his marriage proposal 4 years ago, when he was penniless and unemployed. FML

#21362501
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41080) - you deserved it (2177)

On 02/24/2015 at 10:10am - love - by Anonymous - India (Tamil Nadu)

Today, I bought How To Train Your Dragon and the cashier started complaining how her kids keep demanding dragon stuff and that mine will start after they see the movie. I don't have any kids, and I didn't have the courage to tell her I was buying it for myself. FML

#21362244
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26736) - you deserved it (4726)

On 02/23/2015 at 11:58pm - misc - by MDoremis - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my wedding venue called and canceled our reservation because we were double booked with a spaghetti bingo night, which they felt was more important. FML

#21361818
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33211) - you deserved it (2519)

On 02/23/2015 at 3:49pm - misc - by looking4newvenue (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend commented on one of his his ex-girlfriend's Facebook photos, saying how smoking hot she looks and how much he wants her. His excuse was that the photo was posted before he was with me, so he's clearly doing nothing wrong. FML



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