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jkozzy

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jkozzy
  • Town/Country : Oklahoma, US
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 19 June 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 1593
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

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jkozzy's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

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jkozzy's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up super glued to the toilet. FML

#19420355
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20682) - you deserved it (7159)

On 04/06/2012 at 10:26pm - misc - by Tanner - United States (Oregon)

Today, I realized I'm too short to use the urinals at work. FML

#19416439
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24323) - you deserved it (2333)

On 04/06/2012 at 7:32am - work - by littleman (man) - United States

Today, I found out why teenage boys have "Keep out" and "Please knock" signs on their bedroom doors. FML

#19305643
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8329) - you deserved it (41532)

On 03/19/2012 at 1:49am - intimacy - by ari - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

#19289453
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18402) - you deserved it (10454)

On 03/16/2012 at 4:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, I was chatting to a nice girl at the mall, and I said if she didn't get a raise, I would write to the management. She said they have no email address, and I replied that I meant an actual letter. "Like, on paper?" she said, "Damn, how old are ya, pops?" I want a ticket off this planet. FML

#19276990
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23865) - you deserved it (2905)

On 03/14/2012 at 11:17am - misc - by S. Michaels (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27400) - you deserved it (17378)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, I got pulled over for drunk driving. This is the second time its happened. I was completely sober both times. FML

#19276070
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19953) - you deserved it (13677)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I'm so sick that I'm drinking fluids just to make it hurt less when I puke. FML

#19195188
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20782) - you deserved it (1794)

On 03/01/2012 at 11:17am - health - by cmoney6452 - United States (Ohio)

Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML

#19174199
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33498) - you deserved it (5187)

On 02/27/2012 at 10:55am - health - by awhmaaan - United Kingdom

Today, I had a dream about the damn cappuccino machine at work. FML

#19170840
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16609) - you deserved it (3119)

On 02/26/2012 at 9:43pm - misc - by slickrick22 (man) - United States

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16465) - you deserved it (28439)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, I finally broke down and told my mom that I'd relapsed with my eating disorder. She told me to quit whining and eat a burger because she didn't want to pay for another therapy session. FML

#19142645
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23543) - you deserved it (9793)

On 02/22/2012 at 10:49pm - health - by SmallTownCutie -

Today, I walked into two things. The first was a spiderweb. The second, due to blind panic, was oncoming traffic. FML

#19072252
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20703) - you deserved it (4798)

On 02/14/2012 at 7:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while I was going to the bathroom, my engagement ring fell off into the toilet, which then automatically flushed. FML

#19017910
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27216) - you deserved it (3249)

On 02/07/2012 at 12:49pm - misc - by joy - United States

Today, I put my boyfriend's t-shirt on and took sexy pictures with nothing else but panties. I then sent him the pictures. His reply was, "Can you wash that when you're done?" FML

#19009550
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28721) - you deserved it (6939)

On 02/06/2012 at 11:18am - intimacy - by jodibut - United States (Oklahoma)



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