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jkilmer

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jkilmer
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 September 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 2295
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jkilmer : I'm a crazy bitch, point blank period. I like to have fun but most of the time I can't stand people. I love reading and all types of music. If you're still reading this, you should probably stop since I have nothing left to say.

jkilmer's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of jkilmer's badges

jkilmer's favorite FMLs

Today, I just had a phone interview with a college. The lady asked me to spell out my password to a site so she can access my test scores. The password was "dick." FML

#9372806
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9407) - you deserved it (42194)

On 03/25/2010 at 7:07am - intimacy - by uhoh901 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

#9110965
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37246) - you deserved it (8007)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I realized explosive diarrhea can happen, and at the most inopportune times, such as on the day of MY wedding. At the alter while my husband said his vows. FML

#8658648
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50978) - you deserved it (2575)

On 02/26/2010 at 5:23am - love - by pain (woman) - Japan

Today, while eating at an outdoor café, a man on the street came up to me and said, "My girlfriend is sexier than you, bitch." Thanks for the confidence boost. FML

#8539206
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22140) - you deserved it (1741)

On 02/22/2010 at 12:02am - misc - by sandiego - United States (Texas)

Today, my step-mom yelled at me for an hour, calling me a slut because our male dog saw me naked. FML

Today, I found out that my best friend pays my boyfriend to this day to take me out. FML

#8299484
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30057) - you deserved it (2491)

On 02/15/2010 at 1:08pm - love - by thirdwheel (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that I was not adopted and in fact my parents are my biological parents. How did I find out? Over dinner. How long have I been believing I was adopted? 22 years. Why did I start believing I was adopted? My siblings thought it would be a funny joke. My mom played along. FML

#8124338
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37746) - you deserved it (2611)

On 02/11/2010 at 7:22am - misc - by Biological (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dad got a hard-on looking at my best friend. He asked me how my NutriSystem diet was going. He was looking at my friend's boobs when he asked me. FML

#8082949
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17849) - you deserved it (1843)

On 02/10/2010 at 7:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I have the flu, food poisoning and I'm on my period. I have enough liquids pouring out of me from various holes to satisfy a sewer. FML

#8045354
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40472) - you deserved it (2752)

On 02/09/2010 at 7:22am - health - by SickSmick (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I found out the love of my life, my husband, is cheating on me. When I confronted him about it, his response was, "Don't blame me, you're the gullible bitch." FML

#7992828
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37933) - you deserved it (3311)

On 02/07/2010 at 11:03pm - love - by Hm (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to change my boyfriend's background on his phone. As I was in the process of changing it, I noticed his most recent picture is of a naked girl. The naked girl happens to be my 18 year old sister. FML

#7908688
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41848) - you deserved it (4235)

On 02/05/2010 at 4:18pm - love - by whoknows?! - Sent from mobile version

Today, I decided to change my boyfriend's background on his phone. As I was in the process of changing it, I noticed his most recent picture is of a naked girl. The naked girl happens to be my 18 year old sister. FML

#7908688
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41848) - you deserved it (4235)

On 02/05/2010 at 4:18pm - love - by whoknows?! - Sent from mobile version

Today, after confessing my love for my best friend, he looked at me and said "I'm not feeling it. But does this mean we can have sex?" FML

#7618857
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17200) - you deserved it (2708)

On 01/27/2010 at 7:09pm - intimacy - by Boned...hard - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend kept trying to convince me to do anal with him. After denying him several times he told me "Why it feels good, trust me." I asked him how would he know. There was a long awkward silence when he then replied with "I'm not gay I swear." FML

#7563904
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25237) - you deserved it (3814)

On 01/25/2010 at 3:47am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)



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