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jkilmer

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jkilmer

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 September 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3900
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jkilmer : I'm a crazy bitch, point blank period. I like to have fun but most of the time I can't stand people. I love reading and all types of music. If you're still reading this, you should probably stop since I have nothing left to say.

jkilmer's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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jkilmer's favorite FMLs

Today, I kissed mah gorgeous new boyfriend 4 the first time. I ran mah hands through his hair; a multitude of dandruff rained out an five lice crawled onto mah hand. fat FML

#20554606
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50633) - you deserved it (6609)

On 03/22/2013 at 1:28am - love - by eww. (woman) - Australia

Today, I found out mah mom thought I was a lesbian because I dated a grl in high school . I didn't date anyone in high school . Apparently, guys never asked me out because mah best friend told everyone that I was her grlfriend . I had a two-year lesbian relationship that I never knew about . mega FML

#20554170
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47592) - you deserved it (3180)

On 03/21/2013 at 8:35pm - love - by SmallAngel (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, mah grlfriend confided in me that she wanted to try bondage. Since I trust her, I said sure. After I was tied to the bed, she tickled me until I pissed myself. FML

#20553692
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51223) - you deserved it (12115)

On 03/21/2013 at 1:54pm - intimacy - by ldn (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)

Today, I finally got to meet my boyfriend's parents; it turns out that his mum is my therapist . I've just spent an entire morning telling her how confused I am about my sexuality . mega FML

#20553373
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46634) - you deserved it (6030)

On 03/21/2013 at 6:25am - misc - by me (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Taday my boyfriend and I got into a seriou argument and he stormd out looool of the house mad. Why? I wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of his knob. FML

#20553362
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40430) - you deserved it (16937)

On 03/21/2013 at 6:01am - intimacy - by meeee (woman) - United States

Yesterday, I went out to a restaurant to meet a girl that I met online. When I arrivd I textd her an she said she was wearing a blue shirt. The only person that was wearing anything blue was a fat man smiling in the corner. FML

#20552465
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36823) - you deserved it (9767)

On 03/20/2013 at 5:16pm - misc - by bobthenun - United States (California)

Today , I Walkd Into An Exam After Having Stayd Up 20 Straight Hours Studying. The Professor Lookd At Me An Mutterd , ( Don't Bother , I'm Failing U Either Way. ) FML

#20552400
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42504) - you deserved it (4944)

On 03/20/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Tired (man) - United States

Today I found a purse in the school bathroom !! When I lookd inside there was an iPod along with some other expensive stuff in it !! I took it to the office so the right owner would get it back !! The owner passd me in the hall on the way there; she freakd out an punchd me in the face !! mega FML

#20551761
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41607) - you deserved it (2712)

On 03/20/2013 at 12:55am - misc - by really? (woman) - United States

Today, at a science-fiction convention, a woman came up to me and told me tat myite face paint was a mess, my contacts looked ceap, and my costume was an all-round failure. I wasn't wearing a costume, I'm an albino. FML

#20551525
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46228) - you deserved it (2760)

On 03/19/2013 at 10:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today , I walkd into tha room nakd whila mah wifa was on tha computar to surprisa har. Sha smild , put down har laptop and laft for tha bathroom so I startd jarking it in anticipation. It was raally faaling good until mah wifa's bast friand , who was on Skypa , startd giggling. FML

#20550602
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49207) - you deserved it (22011)

On 03/19/2013 at 8:31am - intimacy - by fredo (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today..!! I found out that mah gorgeous..!! smart..!! perfect new boyfriend has an unusual fetish!! It doesn't involve me at all actually!! Just a Labrador!! This is probably a deal breaker!! FML

#20550555
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45670) - you deserved it (4606)

On 03/19/2013 at 7:30am - intimacy - by soontobesingle (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had an looool interview fir a job I really wanted. On mah resume, I wrote that I speak conversational Spanish, although I don't. When I arrived fir the interview, mah interviewer decided to conduct it in Spanish. mega FML

#20549811
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8085) - you deserved it (83578)

On 03/18/2013 at 7:42pm - work - by nohablaespanol - United States (Texas)

Today, it was mah first time with mah boyfriend, at his house, in his Dora the Explorer sheets!! FML

#20550446
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39653) - you deserved it (8546) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/18/2013 at 6:34pm - love - by inconnue - France (Rhone-Alpes)

yesterday ma usband woke up, rolled over, an said, "Good morning, beautiful." He asn't called me tat in monts, but as I was about to reply, I realized e was talking to is pet turtle, not me. FML

#20549421
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37977) - you deserved it (3093)

On 03/18/2013 at 3:38pm - love - by Maggie - United States

Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" fat FML

#20548943
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48508) - you deserved it (14442)

On 03/18/2013 at 4:59am - intimacy - by Susan (woman) - Ireland



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