About jkilmer : I'm a crazy bitch, point blank period. I like to have fun but most of the time I can't stand people. I love reading and all types of music. If you're still reading this, you should probably stop since I have nothing left to say.
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Today, I woke up to my friend stroking my face with the bottom of his foot and whispering, "Shh, you're okay." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33750) - you deserved it (3372)
On 05/13/2013 at 6:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I lost my patience and asked the deadbeat I loaned money to last year to please pay up. His response: "Blow me." No thanks, dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40434) - you deserved it (4505)
On 05/13/2013 at 5:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, a woman approached me in the street and slapped me, ranting about how I stole her man. I don't even know her man, or her, and I live over a thousand miles away in Scotland. I'm back in town for the first time since my childhood to attend a wedding. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41069) - you deserved it (2380)
On 05/13/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by culodegrillo (woman) - Spain
Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57998) - you deserved it (3566)
On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)
Today, our cat died. My five-year-old tried to flush him down the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42499) - you deserved it (3851)
On 05/13/2013 at 12:29am - animals - by JamiesMom (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my little brothers wouldn't stop teasing me over the fact that I'm a virgin and they are not. They are 13 and 16, I'm 22. What's worse? My dad quickly joined them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50857) - you deserved it (6140)
On 05/12/2013 at 12:35am - misc - by lamsolonely - United States
Today, my boyfriend woke me up the same way he always does, by pulling on my hair. Just to be playful, I pulled him down on top of me and kissed him. Turns out his brother thought it would be funny to wake people up the same way. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45320) - you deserved it (7515)
On 05/11/2013 at 7:04pm - love - by wrongguy - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my stalker ex girlfriend turned up at my wedding, uninvited, wearing a wedding dress. FML
I agree, your life sucks (70100) - you deserved it (4228)
On 05/11/2013 at 2:25am - love - by tdrtnlz - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)
Today, I happily told my parents that my boyfriend proposed to me last night. My dad's response? "Marry that goofy bastard and you're out of the will." FML
I agree, your life sucks (45565) - you deserved it (4308)
On 05/10/2013 at 7:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Switzerland (Sankt Gallen)
Today, my mother and I got into an argument, and she told me to go to my room. I refused, prompting her to slap the shit out of me. I'm 29, and she was visiting me at my own house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50876) - you deserved it (5085)
On 05/10/2013 at 3:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)
Today, I had my college graduation ceremony. As I was walking across the stage, some asshat, in front of over 55,000 students and staff, brazenly ran across the stage, snatched my diploma up out of the president's hand, and ran off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50042) - you deserved it (3138)
On 05/09/2013 at 6:11am - misc - by Uwrongfodat (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went to therapy. I started talking about my childhood and my life. By the time the session was over my therapist was crying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52533) - you deserved it (3096)
On 05/09/2013 at 1:30am - health - by Screwed Up (man) - United States
Today, my family flew out to surprise my grandma for her 70th birthday. When we arrived, she and my grandpa were both sitting on the couch, high, smoking a joint. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44004) - you deserved it (9423)
On 05/08/2013 at 2:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my water broke while my boyfriend was breaking up with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (64107) - you deserved it (5319)
On 05/08/2013 at 1:41am - health - by Carrie - United States (California)
Today, I turned 35. Because I'm still single, my sister bought me a cat to help start my "inevitable collection." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39047) - you deserved it (4915)
On 05/07/2013 at 4:17pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Monday 20 May 2013
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