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jjimm

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jjimm

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  • Number of visits : 167
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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jjimm's favorite FMLs

Today, I was scheduled for an interview at a local firm owned by two partners. The secretary told me to be there at around 12:00 to 12:30 pm, so I arrived at 12:15. The first boss told me off for being early, the other one yelled at me for being late. FML

#20084697
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21423) - you deserved it (2118)

On 09/23/2012 at 5:23am - work - by whatisthisidonteven (woman) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, after weeks of dealing with a bad hair cut, my hair finally grew back to my preferred length. Today is also the day my roommate replaced my shampoo with hair remover as a prank. FML

#20084656
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22900) - you deserved it (1424)

On 09/23/2012 at 4:14am - misc - by Hairless freak - United States (California)

Today, I learned that Nyquil has such an amazing effect on me, that it won't even allow me to wake up to go to the bathroom. FML

#20084489
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19592) - you deserved it (2027)

On 09/23/2012 at 1:03am - health - by Nyquilwtf - United States

Today, I went to run an errand while my parents helped unpack boxes in my new house. When I returned, my dad said to me, "I wasn't going to say anything, but we 'did it.' I'll let you figure out which room". FML

#20084453
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21719) - you deserved it (1723)

On 09/23/2012 at 12:32am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after months of believing my house is haunted, and years of being scared of the dark, I finally had to admit to myself that the only way I can go to the bathroom in the middle of the night is if my cat follows me and sits outside the door. I'm 23. FML

#20084083
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17541) - you deserved it (6803)

On 09/22/2012 at 8:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, after a week of not seeing each other, my boyfriend has a three day break from work. This would be great if he hadn't just told me he's having a Guild Wars 2 marathon. Now all I have to look forward to is slow wifi and anguished screams every time his character dies. FML

#20084035
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17016) - you deserved it (2642)

On 09/22/2012 at 7:49pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, while dog sitting my neighbor's Great Dane, I decided to order pizza. As soon as I received it, the dog stood in the hallway staring at me. As soon as I moved, he ran full force and knocked me into the door, causing me to fall and drop the pizza, which he promptly devoured in front of me. FML

#20083358
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20293) - you deserved it (2994)

On 09/22/2012 at 10:12am - animals - by Grauncho - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was made aware that my teenage son used "Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter" as a reference point in a class debate as if it was a biopic. Oh dear. FML

#20080602
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16637) - you deserved it (2383)

On 09/20/2012 at 10:58am - kids - by Hmmmm (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet. It was a used condom. FML

#20080363
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18077) - you deserved it (26528)

On 09/20/2012 at 3:00am - intimacy - by myself - United States (California)

Today, I went to my dentist of four years. After the cleaning, the hygienist and I scheduled my next appointment, and she briefly left the room, leaving my file open on the computer. The data in a field called "NOTE" caught my eye: "Sissy. Freak. Always late. Ask about family or will flirt." FML

#20080189
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8313) - you deserved it (24136)

On 09/20/2012 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying on one of my little black dresses and heels. He wanted to "see what the fuss was about." I would have been angry if the sight of him dressed like this hadn't turned me on more than he ever has in the 3 years we've been dating. FML

#20080101
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25870) - you deserved it (5254)

On 09/19/2012 at 11:09pm - intimacy - by ClaireBear150 (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was called into my 17-year-old son's high school. Why? Because it was Wednesday, also known as "Hump Day" and his friends managed to convince him that you're supposed to go around and hump people. FML

#20079735
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21629) - you deserved it (2527)

On 09/19/2012 at 7:33pm - kids - by Judy - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was talking on the phone with my crush. After an hour of talking she told me, "If you were half as hot as you sound over the phone, I'd date you immediately." Maybe I should give up on love and start a phone sex line. FML

#20078825
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30328) - you deserved it (2250)

On 09/19/2012 at 2:24am - intimacy - by annonymous - United States

Today, I went over to my girlfriend's house. She'd told me not to ring the doorbell and just come in so that I wouldn't wake her dad up. As I walked upstairs, her father walked out of the bathroom naked. We locked eyes. I can't get the image out of my head. FML

#20078726
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20490) - you deserved it (3003)

On 09/19/2012 at 12:40am - misc - by Burntintomyretinas - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, thinking I was alone in my house, I went downstairs in my underwear, singing at the top of my voice. I strutted into the kitchen to find two middle-aged men I'd never seen before sat at the kitchen table, drinking coffee. Turns out they will be painting our house for the next two weeks. FML

#20077635
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22402) - you deserved it (3805)

On 09/18/2012 at 10:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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