jjames7543

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jjames7543

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 6 September 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5795
  • Number of comments : 99
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About jjames7543 : Today, out of my extreme boredom, I am taking the liberty in updating this little "About me" box. I don't know what to say so stop creepin' around my profile.

P.S. my birthday is actually on the 6th, but FML doesn't love me enough to keep the right date when I change it. I know it's only one day off, but still...

jjames7543's page activity

Visits<b>connorhperkins</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 1:24am<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 2:55pm<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 7:39pm<b>MoodyJ</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 12:08pm<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 2:18am<b>imshadyxo</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 5:51pm<b>achoo123</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 10:05pm<b>kandysnow</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 8:09am<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 5:42am<b>blueguy135</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 12:03am<b>kzarecor2019</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 8:52pm<b>Xhase</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 6:25pm<b>MelLion</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 6:07pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 8:42am<b>JoshArson</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 8:45am<b>Nicky816</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 4:09am<b>odod777</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 5:10pm<b>katherhinooo</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 5:05pm

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jjames7543's favorite FMLs

Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML

by toni405 / 07/21/2011 at 5:24pm / United States / Love

Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML

by John / 07/20/2011 at 12:38pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML

by douglas / 07/17/2011 at 3:14am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I was given a DUI while in the Whataburger drive thru. FML

by Anonymous / 07/16/2011 at 7:09pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

by Anonymous / 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML

by sbutler / 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

by gir / 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, while babysitting a five year old, I found a cartoon called Metalocalypse for him to watch while I made dinner. I didn't realize it was an "adult" cartoon until afterwards. He watched a whole episode about a clown with a cocaine problem. FML

by dummy / 07/11/2011 at 3:21pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Kids

Today, while using the restroom at work, I dropped my keys into the toilet. I left to find something to get them out and figured nobody would use a toilet with keys in it. I came back to a bowl of dung and "Shit happens" written on the wall in lipstick. FML

by Stacy / 07/05/2011 at 12:04am / United States / Work

Today, as I was going to bed, I spotted a man staring at my window from a neighbor's yard. Ten minutes later, he was still there. I freaked out, started crying, and contemplated calling the cops. My creeper turned out to be the neighbor's wooden lawn ornament. FML

by Nell / 06/30/2011 at 5:10pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I introduced my first serious boyfriend to my mother over dinner. He is Asian. My mom insisted on calling him "Ching Chong". His name is Kevin. FML

by asianlover / 06/30/2011 at 3:24am / Finland (Western Finland) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was walking home from work, my dad drove past, pulled over, rolled down the window and asked, "Are you tired of walking?" To which I replied "Yes!" Just as I reached for the car door, he yelled "RUN A WHILE" and sped off. FML

by RYZILLAHitZ / 06/29/2011 at 9:32pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is extremely jealous of a stuffed toy that sits on my bed, all because it gets to 'sleep in the same bed as me and he doesn't.' Now, whenever he comes over, he throws it at the wall, death glares at it, then gets up and kicks it under my bed. FML

by holdengurl18 / 06/21/2011 at 12:46am / China / Love

Today, I had a sore throat, and I'd read that drops of Tabasco sauce on your tongue helps. I aimed the bottle at my tongue and the whole cap came off, covering my face and filling my mouth with Tabasco sauce, causing me to blow chunks all over the kitchen floor. FML

by Alec / 06/15/2011 at 5:02am / United States / Health

Today, I watched my boss try to stick a magnet to cardboard. FML

by MegaBear / 06/15/2011 at 1:46am / United States / Work