About jjames7543 : Today, out of my extreme boredom, I am taking the liberty in updating this little "About me" box. I don't know what to say so stop creepin' around my profile.
P.S. my birthday is actually on the 6th, but FML doesn't love me enough to keep the right date when I change it. I know it's only one day off, but still...
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30759) - you deserved it (2352)
On 08/24/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by skichick54 - United States (Washington)
Today, I was baking cookies. I stared at them for 15 minutes and finally asked my dad, "Why are these taking so long?" He looked up at the oven and replied, "It might help if you turn the oven on." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7073) - you deserved it (31929)
On 08/23/2011 at 2:18pm - misc - by Kendal - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my grandpa told me what he'd do if he was president. I sat there for 30 minutes listening to how he'd get rid of prisons, send all the prisoners to a desert for 5 years and give them a gun to fight over. And then he'd surgically attach child molesters' penises to their foreheads. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23313) - you deserved it (4135)
On 08/23/2011 at 10:46am - intimacy - by Andrew (man) - United States
Today, I burned my tongue. With a flat iron. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6573) - you deserved it (38016)
On 08/22/2011 at 2:43am - health - by heheheh - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24494) - you deserved it (3462)
On 08/20/2011 at 3:42am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28385) - you deserved it (5113)
On 08/17/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - United States
Today, my father tricked me into eating a Tasmanian habanero, saying it was just another pepper. The burning in my mouth was unbearable, but nothing compared to when I took a shit later in the day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24988) - you deserved it (3246)
On 08/12/2011 at 1:25pm - misc - by Coldsnap - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Today, my wife heard that wifi could be harmful for our newborn baby's undeveloped brain box. Her solution was to switch the wifi off on our laptops. She won't listen to the flaw in her plan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20346) - you deserved it (2358)
On 08/08/2011 at 10:01pm - health - by anonymous - United States
Today, I broke my leg while trying to show my friend how I broke my other leg. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18851) - you deserved it (60468)
On 08/02/2011 at 10:17am - health - by chinchilla4404 (woman) - United States
Today, while working at Kohl's this woman came up to me and asked if I was Native American, I said yes, she then says "Oh! I thought you guys went extinct." This is the country I live in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35914) - you deserved it (2489)
On 07/29/2011 at 11:18am - work - by crazygirl12 - United States (Missouri)
Today, at a campfire, I whipped out my guitar to serenade this girl I like with a Nick Drake song. When I was done, she said it was nice, but that my singing voice sounds a bit like the Swedish Chef from the Muppet Show. A couple of people nearby burst out laughing in agreement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19727) - you deserved it (4621)
On 07/28/2011 at 8:27pm - misc - by Branski - United States
Today, I gave my dad a brochure for anger management. His response? Throwing a chair out the window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29976) - you deserved it (6358)
On 07/28/2011 at 11:25am - health - by 99520 - United States (Indiana)
Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24134) - you deserved it (11459)
On 07/28/2011 at 1:39am - kids - by anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I went shopping with my grandma. She went to the bathroom and was gone for a long while. I jokingly asked, "What happened, you fall in?" She did. She had shit all over the back of her shirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29157) - you deserved it (5908)
On 07/25/2011 at 11:35pm - misc - by Ima_Moronski - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I called my seven-year old son to help me with the ice-maker on the fridge because it wasn't working. Without even pausing, he turned the child lock off and started laughing at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10247) - you deserved it (24925)
On 07/25/2011 at 11:19pm - kids - by unnamed - United States (California)
Monday 17 June 2013
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