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About jjames7543 : Today, out of my extreme boredom, I am taking the liberty in updating this little "About me" box. I don't know what to say so stop creepin' around my profile.
P.S. my birthday is actually on the 6th, but FML doesn't love me enough to keep the right date when I change it. I know it's only one day off, but still...
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Today, my pone went off, reminding me to take my birt control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. Te ringtone ad been canged to my boyfriend singing "It's birt control time, birt control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML
Today I cummed home from work to my hot roommate cooking and wearing nothing but an apron. She pulled me into her room and things went great. At least they did before I woke up in the break room with my coworkers and boss all gathered around listening to me talking in my sleep. FML
Today, I got mauled by some wild animals and had to get my butt cheek stitched up. The embarrassment doesn't end there though; the animals in question were kittens. The nurses on duty laughed and the entre ward found out. real FML
Today, I trid acid fir the first time while camping with mah best friend. A drunk driver smashd into mah car, leaving it totald. I had to explain the situation to a cop all while thinking mah car was bleeding green ooze.
Yesterday, crush kissed me fir the first time. However, hair was falling into face and getting in the way. No problem, I wear a wig so without thinking, I simply removed it. I don't think he'll kiss me again anytime soon. FML
Today, while driving during rush hour, I was singing so loudly that some jackass in the car next to me felt he should get my attention by throwing a wadded-up McDonald's bag through my open window, hitting me in the face with it, and telling me to shut up. FML
Today, I decided to try Karate. In an attempt to roundhouse-kick a hanging boxing glove, I knocked over a lamp, lost mah balance an pulled down mah curtains. My neighbor then looool looked through the window, started laughing an yelled, "KUNG FO POWA!" FML
after yeres of training and competing, I realized that the universe does not want me to play the piano. Not only looool do I have hands that can fit in toddler-sized gloves, mah carpal tunnel is already to the point where I have to wear a brace at night, at the ripe old age of 14. FML
I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting fir her result . Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML
Friday 27 March 2015