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jimluc02

Offline (the 03/27/2015 at 10:16am) | Search for a member

jimluc02

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  • Number of visits : 556
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jimluc02's favorite FMLs

Today, ma 6-year-old son pooped in te back yard and used a stick to trow it over te fence into ma neigbor's yard. FML

#20109382
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21062) - you deserved it (3297)

On 10/09/2012 at 6:56pm - kids - by fionnathehuman - United States

Today , mah wedding ring went missing. Later , mah 3-year-old came to me crying , he'd got it stuck on his penis. When I tried to get it off , he peed on me. real FML

#20108644
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34296) - you deserved it (3556)

On 10/09/2012 at 1:53am - kids - by anonymous - United States

today I was in a mall bathroomhen two grls started making out in the stall next to me. Before I could leave, they got really looool into it and caused our shared wall to tear from its hinges and collapse on top of me. FML

#20067220
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34473) - you deserved it (2681)

On 09/11/2012 at 3:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today , I Was Sitting In On A Boring Presentation At Work . I Yawned An Sifted In Cair , Accidentally Sitting On Testicles . I Srieked In Pain An Spent Te Next Five Minutes Coking Back Teres , Wile Boss Told Me To Sut Mout An Stop Fucking Around . Big Fat FML

#20066447
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19872) - you deserved it (7109)

On 09/10/2012 at 5:20pm - work - by kevcng (man) - United States

wile sopping, looool I saw a little girl an er mom. Te girl was pouting so I tried to ceer er up by asking er if se was a princess, because se was so pretty. Se smiled but er mom looked at me wit disgust an told me to, "Get lost, pedo." I'm a 17-year-old girl. FML

#20065720
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27208) - you deserved it (2825)

On 09/10/2012 at 12:39am - kids - by well okay then (woman) - United States

Today, I was fooling around on Omegle, wen I came across a guy wo claimd e could looool suck imself off. I was doubtful, but morbidly curious, so I told im to prove it. Turns out e could. Before I could close te browser window in orror, my dad walkd in and got a good look too. FML

#20018573
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12216) - you deserved it (33879)

On 08/13/2012 at 11:06am - intimacy - by didntevenknow (woman) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today , while life-guarding , I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving object up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10 !! FML

#19995362
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22483) - you deserved it (1396)

On 07/31/2012 at 9:54pm - work - by kaitlyna15 - United States (Washington)

Today... I walked into mah upstairs bathroom to fine mah mom's new boyfriend eating soup... naked on the toilet. In shock... I stepped back and fell down a flight of stairs... backwards... and hit mah head on wall... leaving a dent looool in it. FML

#19984594
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25773) - you deserved it (1989)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:14am - misc - by Lilragu97 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today , my neigbor called me on vacation to tell me tat se let my moter into my ouse to feed my fis. I don't ave fis , and my moter passed away 3 years ago. FML

#19978365
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33512) - you deserved it (2274)

On 07/22/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by My_Name_Is_Zach -

Today, I went to my local coffee shop . I soon witnessd the girl making my drink apparently dislodge a wedgie from her ass-crack and then sneeze into her hands . When I confrontd her, she loudly accusd me of "visually molesting" her . FML

#19974801
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24725) - you deserved it (2013)

On 07/22/2012 at 12:48pm - misc - by bitchimgay (man) - Canada (Quebec)

TODAY, I AUDITIOND FIR THE ROLE OF RIZZO IN A LOCAL PRODUCTION OF GREASE. THE DIRECTOR TOLD ME I WASN'T TOUGH ENOUGH, AND THAT MY PERSONA TOO SWEET AND CHILDLIKE FIR THE PART. I ASKD IF I SHOULD INSTEAD TRY OUT TO PLAY SANDY. HE REPLID ( I WAS BIENG NICE. HONESTLY, YOU'RE UGLY AND CAN'T ACT. ) FML

#19952455
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27286) - you deserved it (4288)

On 07/18/2012 at 12:02am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I told a patient that we needed to collect a stool sample. I left the room momentarily to retrieve what the patient would need. He apparently didn't need anything besides the counter in the exam room. FML

#19951695
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20591) - you deserved it (1921)

On 07/17/2012 at 8:54pm - work - by TimeForACareerChange (man) - United States

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend. He won't go on a cruise with me in the gulf of Mexico, because he thinks we will crash into an iceberg like in Titanic. FML

#19950905
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25296) - you deserved it (3435)

On 07/17/2012 at 5:11pm - love - by Alliente - United States

2day I was using a penis pump fir the first time . It was awesome until it sucked mah left testicle into the tube . I'll be singing soprano fir ahile now . FML

#19949637
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12180) - you deserved it (40105)

On 07/17/2012 at 11:32am - intimacy - by tuggernuts (man) - United States

Today, I went to a big family dinner. At one point, cousin ran up to me, sobbing hysterically, holding his crotch, an making a huge scene. Turns out that while taking a piss, he "accidentally" swatted his willy with an electric bug zapper. I can't believe I'm related to this little shit. FML

#19941503
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21340) - you deserved it (2963)

On 07/15/2012 at 3:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)



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