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jilldrankin

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jilldrankin

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 24 November 1989 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 649
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jilldrankin's page activity

Visits<b>daveyyyyh</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 1:15pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 1:56am<b>iredbone</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 1:48pm<b>Emmabear161</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 1:44am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 9:19am<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 6:58pm<b>hnm114</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 8:33am<b>Live4funny</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 2:05pm<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 12:39pm<b>Neilish</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 5:31am<b>pewbear</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 11:12pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 10:03pm<b>TyT63</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 8:50pm<b>kevinhenning</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 12:50am<b>kaitlynmh15</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 1:38pm<b>badluckross</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 10:29pm<b>frykid96</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 5:23am<b>tomc6748</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 4:10pm

jilldrankin's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of jilldrankin's badges

jilldrankin's favorite FMLs

Today, I was teasing my 6-year-old sister about having a boyfriend. I asked her, "Did he take his shirt off?" She promptly said no. A few minutes later, she said, "But he did take his pants off." I then asked why. She said, "To show me his penis." FML

#20743211
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53496) - you deserved it (7868)

On 06/23/2013 at 7:36pm - kids - by joe - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend found an empty snail shell. I tried messing with him by saying the snail had turned into a slug, like caterpillars turn into butterflies. He quickly replied, "Yeah I know. I'm not a tard, babe." and said he'd been taught all that and more back in school. What the hell? FML

#20741108
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42603) - you deserved it (6398)

On 06/22/2013 at 3:28pm - misc - by our kids will be derps (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my girlfriend told me that she feels pregnant. I didn't believe her, given how recently we had sex for the first time, so I told her to take a test to make sure. She's very sure now. FML

#20740399
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29669) - you deserved it (46722)

On 06/22/2013 at 3:31am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I walked in on my grandma playing with herself. Every time I close my eyes, I see things that no mortal was ever meant to see. FML

#20739366
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68872) - you deserved it (6556)

On 06/21/2013 at 5:00pm - intimacy - by bleeeaaaaaacccccchhhhhhhh (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I started playing softball again in a league after not playing for about 5 years. My very first time at the bat I whacked a foul ball into the parking lot and hit my own car. FML

#20724193
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43508) - you deserved it (6171)

On 06/13/2013 at 7:59pm - misc - by Dingbat - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I ordered some burgers at a fast food joint. When I said, "No lettuce," the cashier looked dumbfounded and asked, "What's that?" I literally had to say, "The green stuff" before she got it. I'm losing hope. FML

#20724048
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50649) - you deserved it (3430)

On 06/13/2013 at 6:12pm - misc - by thatisfuckedup - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, accusing me of lying to him about "being a hermaphrodite". His almost total lack of knowledge about female anatomy led him to believe that my clitoris is actually an extremely tiny penis. FML

#20723435
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60266) - you deserved it (5423)

On 06/13/2013 at 12:19pm - intimacy - by Hannah (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I ran out of clean boxers. Thinking nobody would find out, I snatched a pair of my wife's panties. Later, we had a cook out for my birthday, where some of my old pals thought it would be funny to pants me. FML

#20721670
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37561) - you deserved it (68191)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:39pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend of six days proposed to me. FML

#20708141
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80645) - you deserved it (11154)

On 06/05/2013 at 7:11pm - love - by The Clitshank Redemption (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, after finally seeing a psychologist about the death of my dad and spending the longest hour of my life confessing every thought I've experienced in the 6 years since his passing, my psychologist asked me if I was walking home or if my dad would be picking me up. FML

#20705144
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76714) - you deserved it (3651)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:35am - health - by irishbubble (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30789) - you deserved it (65559)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, I finished a big art project. It was a self-portrait done in acrylics. Proud of my piece, I showed my mom. After some thought her first comment was, "well, I'm either going to insult your art or your face." FML

#20698927
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45051) - you deserved it (4495)

On 06/01/2013 at 7:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65651) - you deserved it (18718)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was texting my boyfriend when he said, "Hold up." Thinking it'd be funny, I ran and grabbed my copy of the movie Up, and took a picture of me holding it and sent it to him. He replied, "Getting real tired of your shit." Then dumped me for my "dumb taste in humor." FML

#20696601
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62481) - you deserved it (13655)

On 05/31/2013 at 12:16am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, I uttered the phrase "the pot calling the kettle black" in class. Moments later, I'd been called a "racist twerp" and kicked out of class by the same English teacher who once tried to have another kid suspended for using the word "titillate", because apparently it's "pornographic". FML

#20695090
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47223) - you deserved it (3916)

On 05/30/2013 at 11:20am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)



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