jet

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jet

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 55860
  • Number of comments : 122
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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jet's page activity

Visits<b>jeffm9</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 2:28am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 3:29pm<b>jackel_love</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 2:39pm<b>ibrahem</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 7:59am<b>foxychik10704</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 3:04am<b>stolemysweetroll</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 4:58pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 2:26am<b>heymoon</b> - the 03/10/2010 at 11:58pm<b>prplr</b> - the 08/27/2009 at 5:50pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 08/25/2009 at 1:55pm<b>depinaariana</b> - the 08/18/2009 at 8:57am<b>mahree8mellos</b> - the 08/08/2009 at 2:11pm<b>donkey_hang_down</b> - the 08/04/2009 at 3:10pm<b>lottofee</b> - the 07/09/2009 at 11:21am<b>wienerwagon</b> - the 07/07/2009 at 12:49pm<b>lsutiget1999</b> - the 05/25/2009 at 2:04am<b>username666</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 5:27pm<b>5PoPpIn6DrOpPiN</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 5:55am

jet's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

jet's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents punished me and made me wash my mouth out with soap for cursing. I'm almost 19. I said the word "hell". FML

by jdsksoapy / 03/30/2009 at 4:16pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on a blind date with a girl my friend set me up with. We went to a fancy restaurant and she ordered the shrimp. I told her, "I'm allergic to shrimp, so you shouldn't order it in case I want to kiss you later." She looked at the waiter and said, "I'll have the shrimp." FML

by johnfrank / 03/26/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I had my girlfriend over and we we're watching a movie in my basement. I run upstairs and pop a bag of popcorn. Later I come downstairs to find my 10 year old brother sitting next to my girlfriend saying," My brother always says he wants to screw your brains out, whatever that means". FML

by CaoNiMa / 03/26/2009 at 11:42am / China (Beijing) / Kids

Today, I met my girlfriend's very religious parents for dinner. Somehow we got to talking about her groin hernias that were repaired as a baby. I never knew she had hernias repaired and said, "But she doesn't have any scars down there." There was a long awkward silence. FML

by douchetard / 03/26/2009 at 3:37am / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML

by Alex / 03/26/2009 at 12:42am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend and I were at his house having sex. After about 30 minutes, his mom came home and was knocking on the door asking "What are you doing?" Thinking I might have a chance to sneak out, I got dressed real quiet. Then my boyfriend answers, "Zoe. I'm doing Zoe." FML

by Zoe123 / 03/19/2009 at 2:05am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was nude modeling for the first time for a life art class. The only criteria for the class was that I not move at all while being observed. After a few seconds I noticed a really hot girl drawing me. I got a hard on. FML

by Opplyst11 / 03/18/2009 at 4:37pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, I got out of the shower and my 3 year old sister comes into the bathroom and says "I want big boobies like yours when I grow up." And from the other room I hear my dad go "Sweetie, you've already got bigger boobs than your sister." FML

by Alexa23 / 03/15/2009 at 11:47am / United States (Minnesota) / Kids

Today, my mother finally had her beloved Siamese cat cremated. The cat has been dead for over a week and she has been keeping it on her bed, stroking its fur and saying, "She looks like she's sleeping" and "She's so cold." To top it all off, she's been calling me by the cat's name for three years. FML

by LJ / 03/12/2009 at 10:20pm / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I was masturbating into a sock when I felt something on my cock. I quickly ripped the sock off and threw it on the floor... and watched a huge spider come scurrying out. I just inadvertently fucked a spider. FML

by SpiderMan / 03/11/2009 at 8:23pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend struck up a conversation about the reproductive systems of seahorses. We were getting intimate at the time. FML

by Noname / 01/16/2009 at 12:31pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, my boyfriend struck up a conversation about the reproductive systems of seahorses. We were getting intimate at the time. FML

by Noname / 01/16/2009 at 12:31pm / United Kingdom / Love