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jesuismelogee

Offline (the 09/17/2014 at 5:23pm) | Search for a member

jesuismelogee

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 22 August 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 269
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jesuismelogee's page activity

Visits<b>CandyDawg</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 11:04pm<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 5:14pm<b>akorpija</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 4:58pm<b>Lilly2shoes</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 4:36pm<b>FedoraGuy</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:46am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 10:31pm<b>baltimorelewis13</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 2:14am<b>pikawarriors</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 10:06pm<b>the_guy_wth</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 9:42pm<b>Tbear11</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 8:50pm<b>hare</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 7:50pm<b>petey_gunz</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 7:29pm<b>JSparkz19</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 5:51pm<b>KingofBogans</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 5:43pm<b>speechprincess</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 1:01am<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 1:16am<b>EmberFury</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 1:56am<b>handyone01</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 11:49pm

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jesuismelogee's favorite FMLs

Today, being the prank couple that we are, I decided to mess with my husband. When he got off work, I said, "The lady from your office called and said she was pregnant. From you." He immediately broke down crying, and said, "I knew it." Turns out, my fetus already has a sibling. FML

#20889450
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64728) - you deserved it (6257)

On 09/20/2013 at 9:30pm - intimacy - by oops - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband wanted me to "spice up" our sex life. I guess he didn't count on me vomiting when he came in my mouth. We won't be getting intimate again for a long, long time now. FML

#20888582
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47494) - you deserved it (10578)

On 09/20/2013 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

#20813339
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53411) - you deserved it (8504)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Belgium (West-Vlaanderen)

Today, I was having dinner at a long-time friend's place. In a matter of 15 minutes, her mom had managed to establish unequivocally that three kinds of people were ruining the world: vegetarians, atheists and homosexuals. I'm all three rolled into one. She knows that. FML

#20804013
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44579) - you deserved it (14718)

On 07/26/2013 at 1:31am - misc - by WhyThankYou (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, I was going so slow in traffic that my GPS asked me if I wanted to switch to pedestrian mode. FML

#20801861
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42216) - you deserved it (7596)

On 07/24/2013 at 9:31pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got a call from the police. Apparently my son tried robbing a teenage couple, but wound up getting his ass beat by both of them. I don't know what's worse, that my 32-year-old son is a criminal, or that he got it handed to him by 15-year-olds. FML

#20797971
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42105) - you deserved it (4978)

On 07/22/2013 at 5:06pm - kids - by Parentalfailure (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was on a bus and I was so exhausted that I fell asleep. According to a few other passengers, I nestled into the chest of the guy next to me, and hit him every time he made a noise. FML

#20795078
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41657) - you deserved it (9011)

On 07/21/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by accountnamevalid (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out my "wonderful" boyfriend was recently dumped by another woman, not just after he started stalking her, but after he wrote her a love letter in his own blood. FML

#20792358
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50124) - you deserved it (3693)

On 07/19/2013 at 1:34pm - love - by cheated (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my naked boyfriend walked up to me with my towel around his neck and with a hard-on, then declared he was "The Penis Man" and slapped me with his junk. I thought I was dating a man, not a man-child. FML

#20782097
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47955) - you deserved it (16527)

On 07/14/2013 at 1:03pm - intimacy - by peniswoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

#20769088
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52828) - you deserved it (9139)

On 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm - kids - by nosestealer (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had the questionable honor of explaining the difference between "your" and "you're" to my boss, and very diplomatically make her see why her poor grasp of language could affect our credibility as a communication agency. I'm Swedish, and English is my third language. She's American. FML

#20761131
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51670) - you deserved it (3315)

On 07/03/2013 at 2:48am - work - by grammarnazi-forareason (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I saw my older sister for the first time in three years. We hadn't spoke since I found out that she was the woman my college boyfriend left me for. Unfortunately, our reunion was fueled by her two-year-old son's desire to meet his dad. My husband. FML

#20760666
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64687) - you deserved it (5187)

On 07/02/2013 at 10:39pm - love - by Jenn (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got to explain to my co-worker again why I can't move my "vacation" so she can take hers when she wants. Apparently, in her mind, her seniority at the company trumps my due date. FML

Today, I was meeting my boyfriend's family for the first time. The minute I stepped in the door his mother hit me in the face and kicked me out because I was "the slut her husband cheated on her with." My older sister and I look much alike. Too much alike. FML

#20719355
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62248) - you deserved it (4172)

On 06/11/2013 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my wife uttered the soul-crushing words, "But we're married now, why would we have sex?" FML

#20706140
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84133) - you deserved it (8041)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by ._. (man) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)



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