About jessiekush : im jessica. :P
bands i like:
autopsy, brokencyde, we came as romans
five finger death punch, escape the fate, a day to remember
hollywood undead, blood on the dance floor, blink 182
msi, devil wears prada, eminem, HIM
mcr, as i lay dying , a skylit drive, emmure
and morrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeee...
haha. :P.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I used my hair straightener to attempt to straighten my eyelashes and burned my eyelid. I don't know what's sadder, that fact I thought it would be fun, or that I was stupid enough to think I wouldn't hurt myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7417) - you deserved it (91244)
Today, I found that the love of my life is 3.5 inches, fully erect. My cell phone is bigger than that. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57597) - you deserved it (10127)
On 04/12/2011 at 12:00am - intimacy - by Artic (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my dad set my hair on fire while cooking. He then tried to convince me that it spontaneously combusted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24044) - you deserved it (2225)
On 04/11/2011 at 11:07pm - health - by ILiveWithMorons (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I got my wisdom teeth pulled. My usually detached and unromantic boyfriend rushed right over after work with flowers and movies. A little while later, he admitted excitedly that he'd heard the numbing medication also works on gag reflexes and wanted to test the theory. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37482) - you deserved it (5064)
On 04/11/2011 at 3:27pm - intimacy - by Numb (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went outside to smoke a cigarette. I had my headphones in and was blasting my music. It was also cold so I had my hood up. I had my back turned to the house and wasn't paying attention. My brother thought I was a burglar and tackled me to the concrete. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14477) - you deserved it (20277)
Today, my head has been killing me. I've had the worst headache ever. Happy that I could finally sleep, I plopped onto my bed and bashed my head on the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20727) - you deserved it (7731)
On 04/10/2011 at 2:50am - misc - by Monique - United States (Texas)
Today, a stoned man tried to break into my house. Naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31008) - you deserved it (3194)
On 04/10/2011 at 2:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time he does the dishes. Every dish in the house has been washed three times already. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16113) - you deserved it (51309)
On 04/10/2011 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my husband tried to be romantic by throwing me in a bed laid with roses. Too bad he forgot to remove the thorns first. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41949) - you deserved it (3561)
On 04/10/2011 at 12:42am - love - by torny>horny - United States
Today, feeling social, I went to a bar. During a trip to the dimly lit restroom, I fixed my makeup, and carefully penciling my sparse eyebrows. After an evening of meeting new people, I went home. In my well-lighted restroom, I discovered that my eyebrow pencil was actually my bright red lip liner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14993) - you deserved it (21699)
On 04/09/2011 at 3:52am - misc - by 2classicNot2 (woman) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I finally confessed my feelings to my long time crush. He was the only one I've been able to muster up the courage to open up to. He replied "lmao" and hasn't texted back since. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27949) - you deserved it (4765)
On 04/08/2011 at 9:39pm - love - by notfunny - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, is my birthday. Everyone forgot except my stalker. He rang the door bell the second it turned 12:00. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35217) - you deserved it (2706)
On 04/08/2011 at 11:03am - love - by hopeless -
Today, my boyfriend and I flew to another country to see a concert. He said he'd carry all the cash and tickets in his wallet, so I left my bag at the hotel. He got so drunk, five minutes into the show he took off leaving me stranded in a strange city with no means of getting back to the hotel. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23332) - you deserved it (8487)
On 04/06/2011 at 5:27am - misc - by givemechange - United Kingdom (Belfast)
Today, I subbed for a first grade class. They were releasing butterflies. Butterflies scare me shitless. A bunch of 7 year-olds watched as I screamed hysterically when one landed on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16219) - you deserved it (24688)
On 04/06/2011 at 2:22am - animals - by mottephobe - United States (Utah)
Today, I told my mother I have a girlfriend. Her first answer was "Does she know?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (30818) - you deserved it (3731)
On 04/05/2011 at 8:00pm - misc - by notacreeper -
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
