About jessicircle : The name's Jess
I love reading FMLs, and I've been doing so for a few years.
I am a fan of MLP: FiM & FiW, Star Wars, Assassin's Creed, Pokemon, Eureka, and more.
My favorite bands are Nightwish and Epica :)
I hope to become a botanist, and I love plants.
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Today, I called in sick to work for a second day. After months of my boss trying to get me sacked by spreading vicious rumors about me, taunting me into retaliating, and generally making my life a living hell, he finally got his chance. He sent me a text saying, "yeh dont bother son ure fuckin fired." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22194) - you deserved it (2214)
On 09/23/2011 at 10:48am - work - by sick of life - United States (New York)
Today, I was driving my twin daughters to school, when I accidentally honked my horn. I told them it was an accident. One of my kids said she already knew, because I didn't yell "asshole" afterwards. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7086) - you deserved it (24589)
I agree, your life sucks (26862) - you deserved it (3818)
On 08/12/2011 at 2:17am - misc - by TuteSweet - United States (Connecticut)
Today, while watching tv at my mother's house, a tornado warning came across the screen. After being in the dark nasty basement for half an hour, my mom realizes she was watching a recorded show, and that tornado warning was for 2 weeks ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25844) - you deserved it (3346)
On 08/07/2011 at 1:29am - misc - by cargaljen - United States (Missouri)
Today, while walking home from work, a young teenage girl ran up behind me and dumped a carton of milk on my head. She said, "The cow master baptizes you!" and then ran in the opposite direction, cackling madly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28626) - you deserved it (3237)
On 07/29/2011 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, while walking home, the gods were kind enough to grace me with the sight of an old man jogging past me in nothing but a pair of short shorts. The image of his balls swinging to and fro underneath like a pendulum has been forever burned into my retinas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25109) - you deserved it (4423)
On 07/29/2011 at 2:26pm - misc - by someone - United States
Today, yep, pubic hair is still flammable. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10319) - you deserved it (51545)
On 07/25/2011 at 11:12am - health - by Smokey9 - United States (Florida)
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41329) - you deserved it (6110)
On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States
Today, my parents think that I don't realize all the sexual euphemisms in their conversations. One of the more recent ones being made by my dad at the dinner table: "This sausage is great, honey, but mine is bigger and tastier!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (36054) - you deserved it (2705)
On 07/13/2011 at 2:16pm - intimacy - by wittlegirl - United States (California)
Today, I found out my boyfriend can name each and every Pokémon, but can't remember my birthday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31169) - you deserved it (7925)
On 07/13/2011 at 2:47am - love - by Ignored - United States (Texas)
Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (65177) - you deserved it (6888)
On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
I agree, your life sucks (30390) - you deserved it (3381)
On 07/08/2011 at 1:23am - misc - by Yoda (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was woken up by my step brother trying to put his tongue in my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54273) - you deserved it (3796)
On 07/07/2011 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by lizownsvirgy - United States (California)
Today, while at the beach, I was mistaken for Snooki. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39927) - you deserved it (18570)
On 07/07/2011 at 11:12am - misc - by Unknown - United States (Missouri)
Today, my 15 year old girlfriend called to tell me she is pregnant. Her dad is ex-military, and makes a point of cleaning his guns every time I go to her house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14811) - you deserved it (69495)
On 07/07/2011 at 3:43am - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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