Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

jessesgirl14

Search for a member

jessesgirl14

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 956
  • Number of comments : 122
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About jessesgirl14 : I don't like when people end their sentence with a question mark. Are you really not sure of the statement you just made?! I also hate when people tawk liik disss... Wut da hell zzz wrong wit yhu?! Use proper spelling, you fucktards!!
I have a sarcastic sense of humor. You can often find it in the gutter ;)
Messaging me won't get you far, I'm on this site through my phone...
Have an awesome day

jessesgirl14's page activity

Visits<b>reneetlovesyou</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 3:19am<b>Carrotop12</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 10:25am<b>kaitlennnn</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 5:57am<b>TH3PRIC3I5RIGHT</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 2:39pm<b>aqward_turtle</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 1:21am<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 10:38am<b>HanselF</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 11:44pm<b>chickaslimshady</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 2:06am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 12:19am<b>trex83</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 7:01am<b>msmama1985</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 7:46pm<b>troutbum</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 1:19am<b>wGx14</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 4:21pm<b>Rozay333</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 9:37am<b>mcdekree</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 10:02pm<b>Vagitarian1</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 11:38am<b>jonathanedwards</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 7:47pm<b>NordicPride89</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 1:44am

jessesgirl14's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of jessesgirl14's badges

jessesgirl14's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend said I could only take her virginity while I have a flaccid penis, so I won't hurt her. I get hard from just staring at her covered ass. FML

#19131405
406 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37977) - you deserved it (5606)

On 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I cut my finger with a plastic knife while demonstrating that you can't cut yourself with a plastic knife. FML

#18951415
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10620) - you deserved it (42507)

On 01/30/2012 at 10:27am - health - by cbad (woman) - United States

Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML

#18937632
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48355) - you deserved it (8149)

On 01/28/2012 at 9:34pm - intimacy - by Tiana - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I caught myself thinking about what to cook for dinner tonight. During sex. FML

#18878139
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25959) - you deserved it (6519)

On 01/22/2012 at 6:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to get a nice, relaxing hot stone massage. Instead I got second degree burns on my legs. FML

#18869221
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24379) - you deserved it (3516)

On 01/21/2012 at 9:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, we received our honeymoon itinerary. Our travel agent booked our flight to Punta Cana correctly. Too bad she booked us a hotel in Orlando, Florida. FML

#18851649
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25520) - you deserved it (2167)

On 01/19/2012 at 6:44am - misc - by handymandy - United States

Today, after having a naked wrestle with my boyfriend, I discovered he'd left a skidmark on my stomach. FML

#18822523
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34736) - you deserved it (14224)

On 01/16/2012 at 6:09am - love - by Crashburn (woman) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, my crush grabbed my butt while I was walking up the stairs. In surprise I farted. He won't even look me in the eyes now. FML

#18811404
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31550) - you deserved it (6834)

On 01/15/2012 at 12:58am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, my mother threatened me if I keep wearing yoga pants to school, she's going to have my dad pick me up in a speedo. FML

#18778372
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13901) - you deserved it (43164)

On 01/11/2012 at 7:49pm - misc - by ThatOneGirl646 - United States (Michigan)

Today, I overheard my mom telling my younger sister not to use my razors because she "doesn't know what I may have." FML

#18604441
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24772) - you deserved it (4416)

On 12/25/2011 at 2:28am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job. I thought it was going great and I was doing a good job, until he told me to "stop chomping on it like it's a hot dog." FML

#18513189
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19929) - you deserved it (25080)

On 12/14/2011 at 6:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I had been hiding the ring in the sock drawer. When I went to retrieve it, the ring was gone and in its place was a sticky note that said "NO." FML

#18508427
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51297) - you deserved it (3069)

On 12/14/2011 at 12:15am - love - by newlysingle (man) - United States

Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend that said, "Since you started acting like a dick, you might as well dress like one." FML

#18345679
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11864) - you deserved it (56172)

On 11/25/2011 at 10:02am - intimacy - by Dickhead - Lebanon

Today, I had to bail both my parents out of jail. They'd thought it would be fun to go streaking. FML

#18323291
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28604) - you deserved it (2448)

On 11/23/2011 at 1:02am - misc - by poorchild - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out that my 20-year-old boyfriend won't touch my boobs because he is afraid his parents will find out. FML

#18203488
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42245) - you deserved it (5055)

On 11/09/2011 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by Great... (woman) - United States (Mississippi)



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: