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jessesgirl14

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jessesgirl14

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 989
  • Number of comments : 122
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About jessesgirl14 : I don't like when people end their sentence with a question mark. Are you really not sure of the statement you just made?! I also hate when people tawk liik disss... Wut da hell zzz wrong wit yhu?! Use proper spelling, you fucktards!!
I have a sarcastic sense of humor. You can often find it in the gutter ;)
Messaging me won't get you far, I'm on this site through my phone...
Have an awesome day

jessesgirl14's page activity

Visits<b>braver7315</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 11:32am<b>Le_Rabbid</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 10:11pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 12:39pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 9:29am<b>reneetlovesyou</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 3:19am<b>Carrotop12</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 10:25am<b>kaitlennnn</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 5:57am<b>TH3PRIC3I5RIGHT</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 2:39pm<b>aqward_turtle</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 1:21am<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 10:38am<b>HanselF</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 11:44pm<b>chickaslimshady</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 2:06am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 12:19am<b>trex83</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 7:01am<b>msmama1985</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 7:46pm<b>troutbum</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 1:19am<b>wGx14</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 4:21pm<b>Rozay333</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 9:37am

jessesgirl14's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of jessesgirl14's badges

jessesgirl14's favorite FMLs

Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML

#20037909
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35676) - you deserved it (10404) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/23/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by thekriss - Sent from mobile version

Today, my vegan girlfriend refused to give me a blowjob because, apparently, blowjobs aren't vegan. FML

#20034900
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34829) - you deserved it (8846)

On 08/22/2012 at 12:19am - intimacy - by ihateveganism (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I had to finally accept that my husband is too large for me. Normally, it'd be a bragging point, except my private parts can't handle it. After several infections brought on after vaginal tearing, I'm having to choose between being in perpetual pain, or giving up my sex life. FML

#20028986
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47403) - you deserved it (3358)

On 08/18/2012 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by sal (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I realized why my sister refuses to let me clean her side of the room. She's secretly been trying to revive dead ants. FML

#20023605
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21533) - you deserved it (1502)

On 08/16/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by scarredforlife - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML

#20015589
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14740) - you deserved it (38406)

On 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while I was getting intimate with my husband, he moaned someone else's name. He actually tried to explain himself by saying that he'd had a "divine encounter," and while "possessed by the Lord," he'd been told the name of our future daughter. FML

#20003981
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35275) - you deserved it (2562)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:45pm - intimacy - by lils (woman) - United States

Today, my 4-year-old son cut half of my hair when I was asleep because he thought I would look better that way. FML

#19990341
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21637) - you deserved it (2912)

On 07/29/2012 at 4:11am - kids - by ellieowenie - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my iPhone got back from being fixed. When I opened the box there was a note attached to my phone that said, "All you had to do was turn it on." FML

#19986553
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5855) - you deserved it (37109)

On 07/27/2012 at 1:05am - misc - by ryanharp2 - United States (Arkansas)

Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML

#19983416
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37729) - you deserved it (8102)

On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10690) - you deserved it (36785)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML

#19949637
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11165) - you deserved it (38858)

On 07/17/2012 at 11:32am - intimacy - by tuggernuts (man) - United States

Today, my date made me pay him for picking me up, and taking me back home. FML

#19779965
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25065) - you deserved it (3179)

On 06/13/2012 at 12:42am - money - by bad date - United States (Nebraska)

Today, while driving home from work, I noticed the driver next to me was happily chatting on her phone. I fucking despise these would-be murderers, so I slammed my horn to signal my disgust. She panicked and swerved straight into my car. FML

#19761420
392 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17217) - you deserved it (57547)

On 06/09/2012 at 5:35pm - misc - by k - United Kingdom (Telford and Wrekin)

Today, after getting a pat of appreciation from my girlfriend's father for taking it slow, he found me later, in her room, with my head between her thighs. FML

#19187510
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16488) - you deserved it (43162)

On 02/29/2012 at 5:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I gave my grandparents my old cell to use since they needed an upgrade. I thought I had deleted everything until I received a text from my grandmother. It was a vagina shot I had taken for my fiancé with a message that said "You need to wear more makeup". FML

#19158287
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9382) - you deserved it (31651)

On 02/25/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by ashleynicolle (woman) - United States (Arkansas)



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