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jessal

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jessal

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 10 October 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3037
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About jessal : I'm easy going and fun. If you want to know more then message me.

jessal's page activity

Visits<b>Mafia_</b> - 24 hours ago<b>Wizardo</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 6:32am<b>pipefitter69</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 7:41pm<b>AddictGamer</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 11:47pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 11:10pm<b>PlainWhiteWalls</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 4:47pm<b>fatiezzhm</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 9:57am<b>BeautifulChaos27</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 11:25pm<b>keely617</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 1:12am<b>xwingtwo</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 1:15am<b>Harold6858</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 9:11am<b>chillandfun</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 2:11am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 2:37pm<b>423</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 4:21am<b>Blee864</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 1:42am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 11:47am<b>netflixislove</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 10:05am<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 7:08am

Liked!<b>Mafia_</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 7:49pm<b>troydeluca</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 9:20pm

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jessal's favorite FMLs

Today, at the age of 23, I brought my boyfriend over to meet my parents. My father swabbed his mouth for DNA and fingerprinted him. FML

Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML

#20903328
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43253) - you deserved it (5480)

On 10/01/2013 at 1:32pm - animals - by NestHead (woman) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, I was in an Austrian bar, making polite conversation in my broken German with a slightly odd middle-aged man. He said, winking, that he was near to his pension. I smiled and nodded, thinking he was talking about retirement. My friend later informed me that 'pension' is German for 'apartment'. Ew. FML

#20903010
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32751) - you deserved it (3947)

On 10/01/2013 at 3:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Austria (Wien)

Today, my dad asked me to stop calling him "dad" because it’s too weird for his girlfriend’s kids to hear, because they call him dad. FML

#20901637
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52609) - you deserved it (2514)

On 09/30/2013 at 4:04am - kids - by meens42 - United States

Today, my girlfriend made bacon sandwiches for lunch. I didn't want to be rude, but I couldn't help but mention that the bacon smelled and tasted weird. I thought it may have expired. She said not to worry because she used the dry bacon under the counter. Those were dog treats. FML

#20894470
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47761) - you deserved it (4283)

On 09/24/2013 at 3:08pm - misc - by Undercooked (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my sister came out of her room sobbing uncontrollably. When I asked what was wrong, she put her fingers in my face and asked if they smelled like pickles, and if "that's normal for girls". They did. It's not. FML

#20880468
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43791) - you deserved it (3292)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:42am - health - by Carebeareatu (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a public place before confessing that I've been seeing another woman, to avoid a dramatic scene. After being rushed to the hospital with a concussion and broken nose, I think it's safe to say my plan didn't go very well. FML

#20873101
353 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19687) - you deserved it (99365)

On 09/08/2013 at 3:31pm - love - by verbaltodomestic (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was at the doctor's getting a check up. He asked me if I was allergic to anything, to which I blurted out, "Cats." He gave me a weird look and said, "Don't worry, I won't give you cats." FML

#20865755
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40896) - you deserved it (6701)

On 09/03/2013 at 4:17am - health - by NoNotCats =^._.^= (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got screamed at by a woman at work for feeding her 3-week-old infant formula instead of the bottled Kool-Aid that she packed. FML

#20854260
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46184) - you deserved it (3009)

On 08/25/2013 at 9:28pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, after an argument with my wife, I stormed out of our bedroom through the sliding doors to the balcony. Only there was no balcony, because it still hasn't been replaced yet. I'm now laid-up in hospital. FML

#20843350
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38389) - you deserved it (15098)

On 08/18/2013 at 4:13pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

#20836718
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54422) - you deserved it (6183)

On 08/14/2013 at 5:11am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I walked in on my husband putting my anti-wrinkle cream on his balls. He said, "I thought it'd help." FML

#20822001
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48783) - you deserved it (4923)

On 08/05/2013 at 12:41pm - intimacy - by Serum - United States (Kansas)

Today, my parents staged an intervention because I ate a year's supply of noodles in 2 weeks. FML

Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML

#20786268
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44405) - you deserved it (32470) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/16/2013 at 9:18am - health - by Aliiiice (woman) - France (Haute-Normandie)

Today, I got mauled by some wild animals and had to get my butt cheek stitched up. The embarrassment doesn't end there though; the animals in question were kittens. The nurses on duty laughed and the entire ward found out. FML

#20770807
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42928) - you deserved it (6462)

On 07/08/2013 at 4:00pm - animals - by richardmrcs (man) - United Kingdom (Bradford)



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  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

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