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jessal

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jessal

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Friday 10 October 1986 (27 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 511
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

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jessal's page activity

Visits<b>sexyboi1985</b> - 13 hours ago<b>realmercurial7</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 9:32am<b>mattbaker</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 7:26am<b>aleximo</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 11:36pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 1:37pm<b>JR7ISME</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 2:02pm<b>gotaplanstan</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 11:31pm<b>pipefitter69</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 10:06pm<b>thestrangedude</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 6:57pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 2:33am<b>aa1717</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 4:23pm<b>hawkeyepeirce</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 4:06pm<b>whitevenom</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 3:29pm<b>olpally</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 4:48pm<b>Chloe_C_H</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 4:04pm<b>wilburhp</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 2:05am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 2:56pm<b>TourettesGuyFTW</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 7:23am

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jessal's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the bathroom on the way to class. After washing my hands, I couldn't figure out how to turn off the water. I finally resorted to asking a professor for help. She turned it off, looked me in the eyes and said, "Please don't tell me you're here on a scholarship." FML

#20948176
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24559) - you deserved it (32208)

On 11/06/2013 at 7:16pm - misc - by nevergoingtopeeagain - United States (Texas)

Today, my brother and I got into an intense argument that ended up with us trading blows and having the cops called on us. Apparently I was "insulting his intelligence" by trying to explain that you don't make buttermilk by putting butter in milk. He's 18. FML

Today, at work, I had to explain to my co-manager at work what a period was, after he refused to let an employee go change her tampon. Afterwards, he panicked, saying he thought women made that up so they didn't have to have sex, before trying to send her to the hospital and fainting. We're 24. FML

#20944786
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61765) - you deserved it (4029)

On 11/04/2013 at 12:45am - intimacy - by TheTruthofWomen (woman) - United States

Today, I was at a family meeting about opening up a business. During it, I had an allergic reaction and my throat began to close. Nobody tried to help. In fact, pictures were taken. FML

Today, after being forced to take my little sister trick-or-treating, we had the cops called on us twice. She thought it would be funny to tell all the people giving out candy that I'd been following her around and that she had no idea who I was, and that she was scared of me. FML

Today, my grandma has been running around the neighborhood, dressed as Bobo the Evil Clown, chasing trick-or-treaters. All I've been able to do is chase after her, and apologize to the terrified children's families. FML

#20941017
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37111) - you deserved it (3281)

On 11/01/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by bobosgonnagetyou - United States (Oregon)

Today, I broke my tooth nearly in half. On a completely unrelated note, the Jew's Harp is my new least-favorite instrument. FML

Today, I found out my 13-year-old daughter thinks the showerhead got her pregnant. FML

Today, I found out that my husband told his mom that she can move in with us once his time in the army is over. We are moving into my house, and he didn't think it was important to run it by me first. FML

Today, I got into a fight with my mother. Her idea of a birthday present to me is buying me a husband. Yes, buying. She told an asshat she found online about my trust fund, and now they're both trying to put together "the wedding of the millennium". She still doesn't understand why I'm mad. FML

Today, I was pushed off of a glacier by a very angry tourist. Why? I work as a glacier guide, and apparently some people find it overly frustrating to be informed that there isn't a café on the glacier. FML

#20924969
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45724) - you deserved it (2709)

On 10/18/2013 at 8:40am - work - by Quasimodo (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, I created a poster trying to raise self-harm awareness in teens for my school. They sent me to the counselor, suspended me, and recommended I go to therapy. FML

Today, my five-year-old daughters realized that if one of them rang the doorbell, it would keep me distracted long enough for the other one to steal cookies from the kitchen. FML

#20922561
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46702) - you deserved it (6513)

On 10/16/2013 at 9:33am - kids - by TiredMum - United States (Washington)

Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML

#20909921
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56936) - you deserved it (3354)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up, got dressed, and left for the 1 hour drive to the nearest vet. When I arrived, I realized that I left my cat in its carrier on my kitchen counter. FML

#20908268
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39454) - you deserved it (23951)

On 10/05/2013 at 12:00pm - animals - by wasted_gas - United States (Georgia)



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