jessaiee

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Offline (the 06/11/2015 at 6:58am)

jessaiee

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2436
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About jessaiee : jessaiee.blogspot.sg

jessaiee's page activity

Visits<b>vsinha</b> - the 10/28/2016 at 11:39pm<b>lpfire61</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 5:05pm<b>iMuffinKat</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 12:20am<b>convive</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 11:27am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 4:42am<b>Tthug</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 5:51pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 11:07pm<b>Holmes27</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 5:45pm<b>forevralone</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 11:18pm<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 8:40am<b>BassTurdo</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 10:16pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 7:11pm<b>acdgal</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 11:01pm<b>gracehi</b> - the 11/02/2013 at 6:33pm<b>Saywat145</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 4:33pm<b>greasyrhino</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 1:08pm<b>DaDick</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 6:11pm<b>neonvortex</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 4:56pm

jessaiee's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of jessaiee's badges

jessaiee's favorite FMLs

Today, while the kid I was babysitting was in the bathroom, he called to me "I need some help in here." Worried I ran to the bathroom and asked him what was wrong. He needed me to wipe his butt. As if that weren't gross enough, just as my hand was under his butt, he pooped again and laughed. FML

by sdasdflkjas / 05/30/2009 at 12:24am / United States / Kids

Today, I was on the bus home and on the phone with my best friend discussing my sex life with this new guy I'm seeing. I was telling her all sorts of raunchy sex things we've done until someone taps my shoulder and says "I'm sure he doesn't appreciate you saying this in public." It was his mom. FML

by Kens / 05/19/2009 at 8:51pm / Canada (Alberta) / Transportation

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML

by soontobedivorced / 04/19/2009 at 12:05am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I bought a brand new flat screen TV. When I brought it home it didn't work. Furious, I walked into Best Buy and yelled at a guy in a tucked in blue polo and khakis. I asked him why it didn't work and he said he didn't know. I kept screaming. He didn't have a nametag. He didn't work there. FML

by asdfghjkl / 04/18/2009 at 10:44pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on a small plane. A flight attendant told us that there was too much weight in the front of the plane and they needed 3 people to move to the back of the plane. I volunteer and walk to the back. She says, "Okay, we're going to need 1 more person." FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2009 at 12:39am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, I was going on a plane to Chicago. My passport picture is 6 years old, and back then I was a beautiful model. Now, I gave birth to a child and gained 50 lbs. When I showed my passport to the airport atendents, I got arrested for stealing someones passport. FML

by chococool223 / 04/12/2009 at 6:51am / Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

by tool / 04/09/2009 at 2:03am / United States (Nevada) / Work

Today, my 8-year-old sister learned how to type her name into a phone using the number key-pad. I later found my phone on the kitchen counter with all my contacts under her name. FML

by Anonymous / 04/01/2009 at 2:07am / United States (California) / Geek

Today, I was out on a date with a guy. His hot co-worker came to have a beer with us, and I knew my best friend would think he was gorgeous. I wanted to take a picture of him without knowing, so i tried to hold up my phone and pretend to be texting. The flash went off. FML

by Noname / 03/16/2009 at 4:41pm / United States / Love

Today, I bought a parakeet for my kids. When I got home and presented it to them, they wanted to let him fly around inside. We went around the house making sure all the windows and doors were shut. Unfortunately I forgot to turn off the ceiling fan. FML

by Noname / 03/10/2009 at 8:10pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I had to run to catch my train, so I didn't get the chance to buy a ticket. When the conductor was in sight, I saw he was a young man and I opened my top a little, in hopes of not having to pay a fine. When I told him I didn't buy a ticket he said: "Close your top, I'm gay". FML

by Mulee / 03/07/2009 at 7:03am / Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest) / Intimacy

Today, I took my girlfriend to a very nice restaurant. I thought it would be a good place to pop the question. I gave the ring to the waiter and asked him to put it on her dessert plate. When she saw it she picked it up, put it down and said "no". Then she started to eat the dessert. FML

by Noname / 03/04/2009 at 9:18pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids?" I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML

by PicturePerfect / 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids?" I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML

by PicturePerfect / 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML

by Picaresque / 02/26/2009 at 12:57pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy